38 — Wednesday, January 9, 1991 ~ North Shore News

LIFESTYLES
Shouid she end sexual dominance?

Q. I THINK my lover is
trying to destroy my sexual
confidence.

He denies doing any such thing.
I am a woman in my 40s, confi-
dent of myself in bed and out. He
is in his late 30s, wonderful
lover but far less successful in his
work than i am in mine.

At first the sex was great. Then
I noticed a pattern. Ef I initiated
sex, he refused. He always had a
reason.

One night he was too tired,
though he woke me an hour later
to make love. Another time he
said his skin was too sensitive to
be touched.

Also, if I ask for a particular
sex practice, he won't do it,
though he will do those things
other times as long as it’s his idea.

What do yeu think he’s trying
to do? When I ask him, he denies
that he’s doing these things. How
can I handle it when he won't
admit he’s doing something?

4. I don’t know if he’s trying
to destroy your confidence, but !
do think he's definitely controlling

WHAT’S GOING ON

THURSDAY

dan, 10--Canadian Federation of Uni-
versity Women. N.V. meeting, 7 p.m.
at Highlands United Church. Guest
speaker: Mary Ellen de Grace of N.S.
Family Services. Topic: Grief
management. Info: Pat, 980-0930.

Jan. 10--Ongoing. Co-ed fitness class.
7-8 p.m. every Tues. & Thurs. to
March 28 at Westover Community
School, 3467 Duval Road, Lynn
Valley. Fun exercise for all levels, In-
fo: 987-1809 or 929-7507.

Jan. 10--Ongoing. Mature Women’s
support grp. for women attending
Capilano Coliege, SFU or UBC. Meets
every 2nd Thurs. 12:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m.
at 848 Montroyai Blvd. N.V. Info:
988-4081.

Jan. 10--Gngoing. Adult Pleasure
Skating every Thurs. Live organ
music. 8:15-10:15 p.m. at Karen
Magnussen arena. Info: Bill/Kay
Gilmour at 987-9694 or Ruth at 988-
1444,

Jan, 10-Ongoing. Capilano Netball
Assoc. 7:15-9:15 p.m. at St.
Catherine’s Church, 1058 Ridgewood,
N.V. Drop-in players welcome. For
women and girls. Info: 980-7435,

coe

Jan. %0--Ongoing. W. Van Adult
Bands, 7:15 p.m. for intermediates, 8
p.m. for seniors. Irwin Park School,

Helen’s Cain

Dr. Ruth
Westheimer

ASK OR. RUTH

the sex in your relationship.

He says when and how you will
have sex. Is that really OK with
you? (I didn’t think so!)

Perhaps he wants to be boss in
the bedroom because he feels
threatened by your success in the
world. There are issues here which
must be discussed.

2455 Haywood, W.V. Info: Sandy,
929-1179 or Sandy, 929-4279,

Jan. 10--N.S. Neighbourhood House
programs: Ongging: Drop-in Badmin-
ton. 8-10 p.m. Thursdays. $2.50
drop-in fee; Games Clud, drop-in fee:
$t. Info: 987-8138.

Jan, 10-Ongoing. TOPS (Take Off
Pounds Sensibly). Meet at 7 p.m. at
N.S. Neighbourhood House.

Jan. 10--Ongoing. N.S. Scrabble Club
meets every Thurs., 7:30 p.m. at St.
David's United Church, W.V. Info:
987-7610.

Jan. 10-Ongoing. N. Shore Chapter
of North American Chronic Pain
Association (NACPAC). Regular
meetings for support and self-help. In-
fo: 985-8304, Joan.

Jan. 10-Ongoing. Say ‘no’ to vio-
lence. 7-9 p.m. Support group for
women from a physically or emo-
tionally abusive relationship. Con-
fidential. Info: Emily Murphy House
987-3374,

Jan. 10--Ongoing. Thrift Shop at
Mount Seymour United Church. 2-8
p.m. every Thurs. Info: 929-1336.

For more Coming Events see first
page of Classifieds. For arts and
entertainment listings see the
Around Town column in Wednes-
day’s North Shore Now section.

SALE STARTS JANUARY 10th!

Large selection of babies wear, newborn-30 mos.
Featuring our Dress Sale -- buy one
at regular price and get another up to
the same value for $1 — Sizes 2-16
20-50% off Boys & Girls’
Sportswear 2-16

° If snowing, please call for sale info!

4142 E. Hastings

298-5141
All Sales Final

North Burnaby
298-0715

Parking at rear

Take him to a counsellor — or
go by yourself if he won't go.

Q. My wife and I got married
when we were bath 18, just out of
high school. She was pregnant.

We divorced a year later. Then
we got back together again recent-
ly after being apart for tw years.

During our separation, I lived
with another woman. That's ail
behind us — or rather, behind
me. It still bothers her that I had
someone else, because she didn’t.

I want to marry her again and
make it work this time. The only
problem is that she says the sex
isn’t as good as it was before. She
says I doa’t make love the way I
did.

Now she says all my moves are
geared to another woman’s needs.
Can that be true? Could my
lovemaking style have changed so
much it’s tursing her off?

A. It’s more likely her lingering
jealousy is turning her off! It is
understandable that she would
have such feelings for a while,
especially since she didn’t have
another lover while you were
gone.

Reassure her that she is the one
you want. After a_ reasonabie
amount of time, she should accept
this and relax. If she doesn’t, en-
courage her to talk to a therapist
about her jealousy.

Q. My husband loves me in
sexy lingerie. He buys me boxes
full of the stuff for every holiday,
including Halloween.

I like lingerie, but it would be
nice to get something else once in
a while. Also, he wants me to
wear this stuff under my suits at
work. He says it excites him to
think about me dressed in lace
under my business clothes.

Some mornings he gets so ex-
cited watching me dress that we
almost don’t get to work on time.
Is this abnormal behavior? We've
been married five years.

A. What a lucky woman you
are! Most wives would envy you.

Tell him you love the lingerie,
but would like to get some sur-
prise gifts occasionally too. Then
give him a list of suggestions. But
I hope you don’t ask for a
vacuum cleaner.

FOR FREE
ESTIMATES

| PATIO DOORS...

SKYLITES...
SUNROOMS...
WINDOWS...

PROVIDING...

XUV FADING PROTECTION
CONDENSATION CONTROL
& AVOIDS ICE BUILD-UP

oe 's Linen s.

SAVE 27-57%
SALE STARTS
THURSDAY 9:30 A.M.

| LUXURY DOWN QUILTS

100% cotton, 10 Year Guarantee, Baffle Channel Constiuction

FAMOUS
BRAND Sn
PERCALEz ©
SHEETS

FROM i OQ! win
PLACE MATS

27h

OFF EACH

5B TWIN

s DOUBLE

F QUEEN
KING

FIBERFILL
PILLOWS
2/8).

LIMIT 4 PER CUST.
SMOOTH TOP

MATTRESS PADS
88

FROM TWIN

{ SLUMBER
BAGS

Ideal fer kids’
W sleep over or
comforter.
Available
Simpsons and
pther popular
characters
& (some slight
; wrgoulars)

” 17.88

lf 1st ually
30.00

KING

FROM

ass

Th

FOUR SEASON
BLANKETS

6 beautiful coiours
COMPARE NOW
ZIWIN soe 19%
F SQOUBLE £008 24”
JoueEN 2500 29%
3506 634°

BATH RUGS

» PRICES ¥
» WILL AVEVER §

OR BELOW

JUVENILE |

BEDDING
(SHEETS &
COMFORTERS)

MARTEX®

* 100% COTTON

SHEETS
100% COTTON
COMPARE

40°

0/ FROM [LAGE TABLE |

I 1378

OFF EACH

(selected patterns)

CLOTH
COMPARE

TAKE 17% OFF OUR REGULAR PRICED ITEMSH!

. “Néar Londog Dru js."
, 936-2722.

986- $203

1 “Marine. Drive - :

Jonathan Interiors |

. 583+ 5220"

| ALL AVAILASLE WITH HEAT MIRROR

27% or: |

NEW SPLENDOR §
» THICK & THIRSTY |

COMPARE NOW ff
BATH 2500 6°°&
HAND 4700 64°
WASH 826 2°86
TMATS.20.0¢6 7° 5
JUMBO BATHE

Now &
14° 5

now fe