Explosions over the nuclear fan

Catherine
Atyeo

JUST ADD WATER

THREE COLUMNS ago, I
argued that a segment of the
homosexual population are
capable of caring for chil-
dren in a parental capacity,
and that because of this they
should not necessarily be
ruled out for adoption —
after a thorough, careful
home study.

I suggested ‘hat we have to
move beyond id zalizing the tradi-
tional nuclear family because it
hasn’t always worked, and indeed
isn't working for many.

My central point was that the

Love thy child

Dear Editor:

I was pleased to read
Catherine Atyeo’s column
“Spare the rod and spare the
child.”

It’s my view that the bibli-
cal quote was intended to
instruct rather than wam us of
how to raise our children.
Spare the rod — don’t hit
them; Spoil the child — liter-
ally. ‘
We should be telling our
children how wonderful and
worthwhile they are. We
should be building confidence
and self-esteem. When they
misbehave, they are usually
crying out for attention —
obviously they necd it.

We can instill in them tol-
erance and understanding —
after all, we all make mistakes
— yet encourage thern to
strive for better performance.
Nicki Marshall
North Vancouver

welfare of the child must come
first, and that sexual orientation
afone is not a criterion for deter-
mining caregivin. skills.

In other wore, heterosexuality
does not a great parent make. Not
once did | suegest thet newborn
babies should be ruutinely placed
into same-sex partner households.

A modicum of sense would tell
us that, particularly given the avail-
ability of loving, capable heterosex-
ual couples who are yearning for a
child, this isn't dest-able or neces-
sary,

Furthermore, a majority of peo-
ple in our society don't want that to
happen and won't tolerate legisla-
tures passing laws and regulations
allowing it to happen. But 1 will
continue to suggest that there could
be situations that test our prejudice
against homosexuals as parents.

For example, supposing both
parents were killed in an automo-
bile accident, leaving two children
to the legally designated guardian-
ship of a loving uncle.

The children Know and adore
their uncle and he wants to raise
them. The uncle happens to be
homosexual and someone else chal-
lenges his suitability as a guardian.

Should he be disqualified from
parenthood sclely on the basis of
his sexual orientation? [ certainly
can't answer that question with a
definite “Yes!”

Reacting to these arguments,
readers have called me a liar, slan-

derer, flake and lacking in creden-
tials, with a cighteous anger appro-
priate to my having told them their
grandmother was a streetwalker.

Contrary to what one irate lever
to the editor suggested, | never
attacked the traditional family.

In fact, indicated in the begin-
ning of the column in question that
it was the strong, nurturing tradi-
tional family my parents created for
me and my siblings that gave me
self-esteem and the ability to be a
loving parent myself,

Anyone who has read my col-
umn over the past few years knows
I have tried to champion the inter-
ests of children and the beleaguered
“traditional” family.

L worry about the effects on
young children when , for financial
reasons, mothers are forced to
return to a job outside the home.

It tears my gut apart when I sce
children being yelled at by over-
stressed “normal” parents in shop-
ping malls,

But please, while supporting the
“traditional” family, let's try to face
the reality around us.

That reality is that the Leave /t
To Beaver clan of the 1950s has
largely gone the way of bobby sox
and saddle shoes.

This assessment of family life
was included in a news story on the
family which ran in this newspaper
on July 1.

As Robert Glossup, director of
programs and research at Ottawa's

3OX

Alternative healthcare in
B.C. deserves consideration

Dear Editor:

Re: North Vancouver City
Council report by Grace Golightly,
North Shore News, June 26.

As a visitor from Ontario, where
alternative health professionals are
becoming more and more recog-
nized through legislation for their
important contribution to health
care, 1am appalled and disheart-
ened that members of North
Vancouver City Council could
reach such an unthinking and
uncaring decision regarding home-
based health professionals.

In making it illegal for reflexol-
ogists, acupuncturists, Reiki practi-
tioners and many others from oper-
ating out of theiz homes or in the
homes of their clients, council
members have effectively blocked
these health professionals from
legally earning a livelihood.

Home-based business is here to
stay — and with good reason.
Many therapies are especially suit-
ed to the peaceful, quiet setting of a
room in one’s home used as a ther-
apy room. Laws are not being

PRESENT THIS COUPON FOR

ANY
NEW
AWNING
PURCHASE

Pe

ALPHA. tent & AWNING {TD.

_

Limit 1 coupon per residence
por MB

passed against psychotherapists,
accountants and desktop publishers,
many of whom also enjoy the con-
venience and benefits of a home-
based business.

If any qualified professional
oversteps the line of trust, whether
their work is healing by touch or
doing tax returns — that is the time
to investigate and lay charges if
necessary. To simply lump alterna-
tive health professionals as crimi-
nals if they do their work at home
is very unjust to say the least and a
gross abuse of power by our elected
officials.

I sincerely hope council will
rethink this decision — surely
every Canadian citizen has the right
to eam a living.

Aurora Bentley
Holland Landing, Ontario

Vanier Jnstitute (which gathers cur-
rent information on the Canadian
family), said in a spcrech to North
Shore Family Services, “families
can no longer be defined on the
basis of marriage.”

This is partly due to factors such
as adoption and reproductive tech-
nology developments.

Glossup also said the “incredibly
harried und frenetic existences” of
most families today result in 40%
of marriages ending in separation or
divorce.

Before they turn 20, he said,
45% of children born in the 1970s
and early 1980s will experience the
separation or divorce of their par-
ents,

Contrary to what some of my
detractors might think, I take no
satisfaction in the daily breakups of
traditional families across this land.
But these breakups are obliging us
to pause and think seriously about
what is best for children.

One reader states: “The hetero-
sexual family structure is not just
an eption among other ‘family
forms.” ”

kt may not be an option, but the
traditional heterosexual family is
certainly only one of several fumily
forms today.

The reaction to my colunin also
provided ample proof that harne-
phobia is alive and well.

twas called a “flake” by one
reader, who denies the existence of
homosexual soldiers in the Second
World War. Homosexuals were not
allowed in the armies of 1939-45
(except the German army), he
states. Does anyone honestly think
that scores of homosexual men
would have come out to their fami-
lies and society in 1939, if so many
are terrified of doing it in the slight-
ly more tolerant climate of today?

And who cares if the proportion
of homosexuals in our society is
10%, 8.6% or 6.4%? The fact is,
there are homosexuals in this world
— including our co-worker,
accountant, grocery clerk, sea or
daughter.

And sooner or later, we better
conte to terms with that and not
expect them to disappear off the
face of the eartn.

FUTON BLOW GUT!

FRetOAY FUTON 2326

Mon.-Sat. 11-6 pm Sunday 12-5 pm

Entrance In rear

oo. OPT

Includes sot pine sofa bedframe, tipie.
fourn core futon. Scotchguarded futon cover,
pillows one! pillow covers. ll ond pillow covers. [While quantities lost.

959 € ist St., N.Van

984-4506 ||

LOSE AS MUCH AS 30 LBS.
iN JUST 8 WEEKS!
Amazing fat burner trims
fat from tummy, tush and |
thighs while you sleep.
Made with a special blend

of nature’s own nutrients |
and herbs, this night time fat j
reduction powerhouse
works like magic.
No starvation or hard
exercises.
Increase your energy level
and rev up your metabolism
naturally.
Extremely affordable.

100% satisfaction guaranteed.”

Call toll free for immediate details

1-800-387-7546
POWERBASE INTERNATIONAL CORPORATION

xSUMMER HOURS*

MON -

WED. nseccusseves
THURS. & FRIDAY .

2408230 - 5:30 PM
8:30 - 3:30 PM

SAT_& SUNDAY ciesconeenereee. 9350 - 5:00 PM