Canadian identity is founde d
On not uttech more than the
national prasrams, What is left
but_ta lanal along with the
architeer of ane such prasram?

WHILE doing his
rounds on earth,
Mephistopheles,
Mephisto for short,
paused to take stock.

He had been successtil.
His was a benevolent tyrmny -
painlessly retieving people of
_ their fiberties, Mephisto liked
“to think of the pact w ith his
flock, which he fondly called
The Tribelings, asa voluntary
‘exchange. As is always the
> ease, what you give up you
_value less than what you get.
- And The Tribelings value che
"goods he provides more than
their freedoms.- The Agency
ver which Mephisto presides
has an inexhaustible fist of
“therapeutic wants, sardunically
referred to in-house as hu
nights. The Agency's charges,
¢ Tribelings, expect no less
- from the Agency; this is a pre-
condition for pawer.,
Somewhat bored, Mephisto _
longs for the’ days w hen
achieving compliance was a -
hands-on affair. But, and here
he flashes a gleam of dentition,
chis facility with the art of pro-
Fe nea is no less magnificent. . .
‘The literature about a free ;
society he has ‘not banned — it
has simply been reclassified.
Th 10 ence spoke of
dividual freedom in ideas, in”

gency, responsibility ‘and self-

governinent, were now The.

-Rubes. The Agency’s agitprop,

he is Cast as progressive. -
"The Firm is Mephisto’s -

crownig glory. Like all

‘Agency Corporations, The

Firm is is not nkrupey i tothe.

definitely with their tax dol

lars. Compouinding this, prices ;

of services in The Firm are

‘OPENNESS.

secet of Bternit

Sair
conmuicnt

pegged at zere. This drives
The Tribelings to use the ser-
vice veraciously, with che result
that endemic shortages ensuc.

‘The Firm a.k.a, Mephisto’s
Medicare has just received a
$21.2-billion infusion, and
The Tribelings are scurzying
about arbitrarily trying to fig-
ure out where it is needed
most. Should it go ta technol-
ogy, staff, maybe towards new
databases to Keep tabs on The
Tribelings, or how about
equipmear? Mephisto knows
that under freedom, prices are
like a compass: pegged to sup-
ply and demand, they ensure
the correct allovation of

Al services: on,
; 21 pe

resources. In The Firm, no
such knowledge is available.
No one knows the prices of
services The Firns provides.
But for all Mephisto cares, let
The Tribelings use derri¢re
doctors (proct Mogists) if mis-
allocation of capital causes
shortages of surgeons.

By design, Mephisto’s
Monopoly produces a different
kind of worker. More medioe-
rity — less malcontents is
Mephiste’s motto. To that
end, his seminal paper entitled
Eqguilibrating Effects of
Industrial Action Among
Doctors has helped stem priva-
tization rumblings, and with
them unease over the subver-
sive power of freedom. In the
paper, Mephisto ciucidates

ow when wages are tied to a
negotiated deal with labour,
rather than, in the case of a
competitive market, to the
individual physician’s perfor-
mance, the position of the bad
practitioner is reinforced. And
all hail to that.

In Mephisto’s country —

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sionals can only but work for
‘The Firm, that is, if they want
to do what they are trained
for. If their instinct tor free-
dono is strong, they must flee
Canada’s jurisdiction. While
many of them have been
expunged, Mephisto must

labour to suppre:

‘the thinkers

in The Firm. This he has done

by entrenching ay
incentive scheine.

verse

Phe hard

cule in The Fiem is that com-
petensy is rewarded with
increased workload, but ne
extra pay: pervasive sluggish:
ness guaranteed.

qt

SIMPLICITY

perfection Ja styles

helps:

Mephisto’s s Medicare in fact

Friday, October 13, 2000 — North Shore News - 7

isio’ 7 medicare olan: a parable

is a pit of perverse incentives.
Can you eet kinkier than to
make failure tantamount to
success? [fa hospital consis-
tently underperiorms the
administration celebrates.
Why? Because this means
more Agency funds to ostensi-
bly “fix the problems.” Absent
ee impetition, ‘She Tribelings
are wapped. As the Eagles
song goes, “you can exit any-
time vou wish, but you can
never ieave.” The
Underperformers, or The
Winners, as they are known in
Agency parlance, shoulder no
responsibility, There is no out-
of-pocker payment for the odd
slip of the scalpel. ‘The
Tribelings pony up for such

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TAL personatity came oul as
the} fate came off.” :

pooling of risks or insurance.
A perfect system of unaccount-
ability, Mephisto calls this.

A particulacly enjoyable
stint is pressing doctors into
occasional slavery. Mephisto
makes it an offence for them
ty refuse to treat defaulting —
Tribetings, thus ensuring that
The Agency gets their tree
labour. No matter that some
doctors are now suing one of
The Agency's front organiza-
tions for “not receiving pay-
ment lor performing medical
services.” Guess who pays?
‘The Tribelings always do.
Please excuse Mephisto as he
heads for Pub Pelf to cele-
brate.

—miome@atcanada.ca

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