36 — Sunday, June 21, 1992 - North Shore News LIFESTYLES What can a worried mother do to stop dad? 5 AM the mother of two girls, ages three and seven, and have been separated from my husband for 10 months, but am not divorced from him. We, through our lawyers, ne- gotiated a separation agreement in which I received custody of the children, subject to my husband having reasonadle and liberal access to them. Approximately two months ago, he moved into the home of the woman that I had suspected he was dating prior to our separa- tion although he denied that he was at the time. Prior to our separation I had been to the home on a social occasion and 2am aware that it has a large and quite deep pond in the back yard. My oldest davghter has come home from the last two visits with her father and bas said that he leaves her in the back yard to supervise her younger sister, while he and his girlfriend are in the kome or front yard. I am terrified that my youngest daughter will fall into the pond and drown. I have asked him on two occasions not to allow our lit- tle girl into the back vard without him being there, but he repeatedly telis me I am a worricr and a smothering mother 2nd that he will look after the children the way he wants when they are ia his. care. What can I do? ’ Try to get your husband to at- tend a qualified family mediator or counsellor to see if they will aid you in having 2 meaningful discussion with him as to your daughter’s welfare. If he refuses your suggestion of mediation or counselling, then you should con- tact your lawyer and ask him or her to commence either divorce proceedings or a proceeding pur- suant to the provisions of the Family Relations Act’ claiming custody of the children in either of those types of actions. I Rave just married a wonderful inan after going with him for two years. At the time I met him, he was separated from his wife who left him for a neigkbor. He re- mained ia the matrimonial home and purchased his wife’s interest. After the settlement of maintenance, custedy and proper- ty division, his wife then started a divorce proceeding and claimed custody and maintenance for herseif aad the children. She received the same amount of money that she received in the Separation Agreement for the childzen and herself, but then reg- istered the Order of the court for mainienance against the tile to his home even though he bad never missed a maintenance payment to ber for herself and the children even prior to entering into the separation agreement with her. Last year he went to seil his home in anticipation of moving into my home on gur marriage and purchasing a half interest in my home so that we would be joint owners. When it came time to clese the real estate transaction, his wife would not remove the tien from the home and it was neces- HEARING LOSS? f See us for good hearing Family Affairs HUGH STARK KIRSTIE MACLISE sary for bis lawyer to go back to court to have it removed. Bis wife argued that he should set aside a lump sum of money for security for their future maintenance. Fortunately he was successful. He now wishes to become an owner of my home and to use some of his money to substantially improve the home. I am worried that she will try to do something to tie up our home in the future just as she attempted (to do to his. What can we do? You could enter into a marriage agreement with him «vhich would deai with the ownership, posses- sion and maintenance of property and, in particular, your home. The home should be kept in your name, but the agreement could allow for his one-half ownership on payment of the appropriate amount of money. His former wife then would not be able to place a lien on the home because he would not be the registered owner of it even though he would be a joint with you pursuant to the terms of the agreement. My sister is a 42-year-old nurse who has been divorced from her former kusband for apprsximately four years. They bave two teenage children ages 13 and 15 who are in my sister’s custody. Attempting to work and iook after the children proved to be toon much for my sister, which resulted in her hospi- talization approximately one year ago and the diagnosis that she had a keart condition which would no longer allow her to work full time. She then retained a lawyer who brought an application to vary the previous Order of the court to in- cresse the maintenance of the children and herself. Her former husband retaliated by claiming custody and making allegations against her. Since he has done this, her physical condition has worsened and she has been kospitalized off aid service — sales, repairs, gj batteries and advice 4 Government Licensed. ASE ABOUT OUR TRIAL SERVICE. North Western Hearing Cenire Hours: Mon.-Fri. 9-5 — Sat. 9-1 985-5552 191G Lonsdale B sees forth Vancouver Fi and on since that time for periods of up to three weeks. The children live with him while she is hospital- ized but quickly return to her when she is discharged. The children, she believes, want to live with her. Will he be able to get custody of the children and, if he does get custody of the children, does that mean an end to (he maintenance that my sister gets from him for herself? it is very doubtful, if your sister has been a _ reasonably good mother, that a court would change the custody of teenage children when they wished to remain with her. Even if she lost custody of the children, it would not affect her entitlement to maintenance adversely. In fact, she will in all probabili- ty be successful in obtaining an increase in maintenance par- ticularly where there has been a substantial increase in her former husband’s income since the initital Order of the court. The questions and answers given'in this column are for gen- eral information only. If you have matrimonial prob- Jems you should seek legal advice so that your advisor can assess your particular circumstances and give you the best advice. Questions about family law and North Shore News, 1139 Lonsdale estates can be directed to Stark & Ave., North Vancouver V7M MacLise c/o Family Affairs, 2H4. ARDAGH HUNTER TURNER Barristers & Solicitors on Personal [Injury AFTER HOURS FREE INITIAL CONSULTATION FAX Criming Mates Only [_ 986-4366 | 986-9286 #300-1401 LONSDALE, NORTH VANCOUVER, BC. " Dr. Brett D. ett D. Coyle DENTIST WELCOMES NEW PATIENTS DUNDARAVE DENTAL CLINIC 250 - 25th STREET WEST VANCOUVER 922-1314 a Six years old and growing!!! SHORE GARDENS CONTEST '$2_ The NORTH SHORE GARDEN CONTEST is now under way. For.the judging of Sum- mer gardens, entries are again invited from all green thumbs on the North Shore. The objective of the Contest is to acknowledge the efforts of residents who in this way contribute to community improvement and beautification. If you spend time in your garden, there is something in this contest for you!! GROW IT! SHOW IT! Closing date for entries is July 15, 1992. Applicants will be advised of judging date. Send completed forms to: NORTH SHORE GARDEN CONTEST ’82 North Vancouver City Hail 141 W. 14th Street North Vancouver, B.C. V7M 1H9 or drop it off at your nearest Municipal Half co mam ma mame mages North Shore Gardens Contest 'S2 Entry Form Name: (Print) Address: Postal Code: Date: Telephone: (Home). Teiephone: (Work) Entrant’s signature } wish to enter the North Shore Garden Contest '92 in the category of RESIDENTIAL GARDENS { )city lot — front and back ( )large space (larger than a city lot) 100'x150' min. ( ) Vegetable garden COMMERCIAL LANDSCAPING & GARDENS : (_ ) large (townhouses) apartment-biocks ( ) other (store front planting, gas station, office buildings, etc.) { )Best use of small space (patio, balcony) Sponsors: District of N. Vancouver, The City of N. Vancouver, The District of W. Vancouver, The North Shore News, Capilano Nurseries, Dykhof Nurseries, Maple Leaf Garden Centre, Lynn Valley and West Van Florist Ltd.