16 — Wednesday, February 15,

MLDS ATS ALORS Oma,

(TaCORMOTIVE’  TUNE-UP SPECIALISTS
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IT SEEMS reasonably cer-

tain that golf’s gold trail

will make its first

. Vancouver stop in 30 years
* sometime during the sum-

mer of 1996.

And if it does, the promoters
may be reasonably certain that
tens of thousands of golf fans will
turn out to watch the big name
pros do their stuff. This will only
go to'prove that people bitten by
the golf bug will crawl, if neces-
Sary, on their hands and knees
through broken glass to see how
.” Faldo, Price, Strange, Kits, Daly

_and company play their shots.

Just one question. How much
will they be able to see?

For instance — and for $63 a
seat in the reds — the hockey fan
gets a: comfortable chair. Because
the game is played on a surface no

‘longer than 200 ft., he/she has no
difficulty watching the skills of a
“dozen players involved in the
action.

». When hunger and thirst come
along, the fan can refuel at the
-Rearest concession stand and get
‘back to his/her seat without miss-
ing too much of the action. Rest

rooms are within easy reach and,
after the game, maybe a five-
minute walk to the family car in
the parking lot.

Now, consider the plight of the
golf fan (And anyone out there
who can remember back to the
1966 Canadian Open at
Shaughnessy will testify to the
general accuracy of the follow-
ing):

A seat? Forget it. But, of what
use would it be with the action
spread out over 150 acres?
Parking? Probably a bus ride away
from the course. And once the fan
gets there, he/she is about as pop-
ular as a roundhouse slice. Barred
from the clubhouse. Eating?
Standing up or sitting on the
grass. Rest rooms? Get in line at
the port-a-johns.

There are about 150 contestants
to follow and once the fan finds
the best action — if he/she ever
does — there is an immediate
command to be qulet, stay outside
the ropes and “hold your posi-
tions, please.” The pros are touchy
about noise and sudden move-
ments. .

If you really want to see what's
happening, it would help if you
could arrange to grow as tall as
Shaquille O’Neal between now
and the summer of °96. Because,
if you don’t, about ali you’ll see is
the top of Dave Barr’s head. And .
not even that, if you get trampled
in the rush to the next tees.

Some years ago old-timer great
Ben Hogan went out on his home
course at Houston to watch the
pros play. He didn’t see very
much, because he’s only five-foot-
cigin and like any other spectator,
had to stay outside the ropes.

“tT was confused,” he said. “I
couidn’t get into position to see
what I wanted to see.” He wasn’t

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interested in where the ball went,
he explained. He was looking for
technique.

Technique, that's what it’s all
about. What Hogan wanted to see,
but couldn't, is what impels thou-
sands of golf fans to pay big
bucks so they can get occasional
glimpses at how the big name pros
do it. Break open the average golf
nut and you'll find a hacker who
absolutely knows he/she can get.
that 15 handicap down to'10 or ft
by studying the great ones in
action.

Armed with binoculars, a pair-
ings sheet, a pair of sure-grip ath-
letic shoes and a full tank of
absolute determination, the fan
sets out to learn how to pronate
his wrists, master the one-piece
swing and study the putting bene-
fits of the cross-handed grip.

About 90% of the spectators at
next year’s tournament will be
golfers, or if you'd prefer the syn-
onym, masochists. They like to
see the pros make the shots they
can't. They marvel at all those
skills on display and the most
common expression you'll hear is,
“they make it look so easy.”

The fact it should be easy for
someone who makes his living -
playing and practising seven days
a week doesn’t reduce the once-
or-twice-a-week hackers’ rever-
ence with which each shot is treat-
ed, Golf fans don’t go to tourna-
ments to boo or find fault. They
go to worship. Quarterbacks and
goalies and pitchers should be so
lucky.

One thing for sure, thousands
of B.C. golf fans will happily part
with a million or more dollars to
see the pros play a game they’d
play for nothing.

But, as everyone knows,

"golfers are different.

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C ETHICS AND Y
SEMINAR SERIES EROM THE GRADUATE LipeRAL STUDIES Program
Mondays, 7:30 to 9:30 p.m.
Simon Fraser University at Harbour Centre -

515 West Hastings Street, Vancouver
Series $45; individual seminars $15

February 20) How HAVE THE RELATIONSHIPS BETWEEN FREEDOM,
AUTHORITY AND RESPONSIBILITY CHANGED OVER TIME? WHAT ARE
THEY TopaY? — Mark Wexler, professor, SFU; Libby Davies,
community organizer.

February 27. HowW ARE OUR ETHICAL VALUES SHAPED BY GENDER |”
AND CULTURE? Meredith Kimball, associate professor, SFU;
Leonard George, Chief, Tseitwau-Tuth Band.
March 6 | ARE THERE EXPERTS OR AUTHORITIES WHO CAN ADVISE OR
DIRECT US IN ETHICAL MATTERS? Patricia L. Howard, lawyer;
Robert Smith, minister, and Andrew Feldmar, psychologist.
March 13) ARE ETHICAL VALUES PART OF OUR HUMAN NATURE?

Do ETHICAL VALUES CONNECT US TO OUR COMMUNITY? .

Petra von Morstein, Simons Chair in the Graduate Liberal Studies
Program, SFU; Bonnelle Strickling, spiritual consultant.

Call 291-5168 or fax 291-5159 to register.
" SIMON FRASER |

UNIVERSITY
AT HARBOURCENTR

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