the. whole’ vou me came they ©
would. stay., with us. She

"' doesn’t have a good relation-

» ship with dad. She ge

mother, when we were
young, always favo
sister because, ‘‘she’s the
youngest and needs
tion’’.

4 months ago, she
mom out to stay over
place 3 or 4 times and she
has been over ‘to mom’s 3 or
4 times too. Last week when
mom returned from Bev’s
she phoned me and we made
arrangements for me to go
out there for lunch someday
this week. Mom phoned me
yesterday and told me Bev
“came to visit me for a
week’, I said, “Well then,
Vm not coming’. When I
hung up I could not believe
what I had said, I thought I
had come to understand
myself better than that. I
“went out to see mom this
morning and told her I was
hurt that.she couldn’t find
time to have lanch with me
and that she needn’t bother
me to go into town with
her to the doctor and to get
Bev to go with her.

.. the . " experience...

-

joye
immensely. Where does. that: :

ds suppose I should t tell jou
sothat I recently broke up

@ good relationship, bt
resent
- had, Then mom says, ‘Poor -

“Bev, her nerves are terrible” *
ms ‘and -

Bev’s.. husband . says; |

“Poor Bev. She fust needed.

“to get” away’ for a = little
‘holiday’’. Poor Bev -

poor
.Bev. That really bothers me. .

What do'I do to go. cabout
handling this!

STEWART: You are scream- .

-ing “hoor me!’’ so loudly, 1:
‘am surprised you can hear
your mother say, ‘“‘poor

Bev’’. In going about ‘‘hand-.
ling this!’ you can cut down a:

lot of ‘its weight by just
handling your own end of it.

Your mother can’t play one
of you against the other if
you choose to do something
for yourself that’s better than
playing that game, You say
you have a good relation-
ship with Bev. O.K., start
having some fun with her.

Don’t try to ‘solve the
problem’’, but rather, enjoy
Bev!

Let your mom enjoy HER
way of giving her love - it
may be the only way she
knows. Meanwhile, why
don’t you make a choice to be
loving and lovable with both
of them, separately and
together. Create a loving
reality for yourself with mom
and Bev, rather than living
as if they had control of your
life. They haven't - but you
do.

Is love here to stay?

QUESTION: Do you think
marriage ia here to stay?

STEWART: Whose? 1! hope
ours does because we've
- enjoyed it for 45 years now

and have the fceling that
during the second 45, we'll
get it right. Do you think
LOVE is here to stay? It looks
pretty healthy to mc. Feed
and exercise it and it will
grow healthily.

. ‘to:
the easy life she. ‘has: on

let me drink? I'm

“STEWART: |
. still -smart.. enough. to know,:

Joving

are smart enough
care “about their?.

Perhaps” he’s :

~ (and.hate)-what is‘happening : __
sto. him, and yet,. -
; ‘enough ‘to loathe the’ idea of ..
* y happening to his son. A lot.

loved “"

‘smart: enough . : _
“themselves.” I. say): “snot a
quite”, because I feel’ most”

‘of. ‘them are very ‘close to

“being able to handle their ~

own recovery.

= . By the way, for a week or
so, why not spend some of

the energy you now use for
grouching a about your dad’s

unfairness”, to figure out

why you want to get into the
very same mess he’s in?
Surely you don't
yourself THAT mpch!

There are 88,636 cars :
on the North Shore.

How many cars did you
work on - or sell - last
month? If your car adis on
this page, every car
owner on the North Shore
could see it

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