Sn Feat 44, May 13, 1979-

. for {your body. It
complimentary ‘service that .
’ shows: you the staff is well

order” that. ‘applies. Kou as

a. ‘wealthy : tourist,. are ex-

pected to be the top, rooster

and chide any employee ‘who-
aa doesn’ t measure up.

This should be done with
great. ‘courtesy and a quiet

voice. Should you allow any

shoddy service, you are

_ considered part of the “great

_. unwashed” and you lose a lot

. 2 of face. (And, most of your
“ Service.)

he 4s. no compliment to

: anyone ina service position
~- tos"serve some yokel who

doesn’t know the difference

between good and bad. In

the staff quarters, you will be
discussed at length, from the
quality and cleanliness of
your underwear to the
calibre of your voice!

Ladies, don’ t be

if - ~onteturning to ent netel = as :
“She left another $100.

room -or- ship's: ‘cabin' = “your
nightwear ‘is. artistically
draped over your: pillow. It
isn't-that the staff has a yen
is a

trained in the European

tradition. ‘The first ‘tinle I -

found my nightgown in: this
position, I got a little afraid -
my cabin steward was a bit
enthusiastic! Luckily,
someone had coached me
about ‘this charming custom
or rd have. disgraced myself!

een

‘STORIES! osmust have a

‘hundred of them. Mostly

told to me by cruise ship
crew and ail totally true!

She was European. About
30, ‘and travelling alone. By
some mischance, she was
seated at a table by herself.
The dining room steward
brought her dinner - and
nearly fell on his face when
she tipped him $100. On the
first night out of port!

4

Tt TCHS

napa

wedi Sen

- Sunday News

-. “Wow,”

*
a)

he thought’.
-himself — “she’s after fay
body!” The next night, after

. She skipped breakfast; and
“. Junch, he served her dimer -

i -. and, . made... sure that
everything ‘was. “top> ‘choice.
She left. another $100.

~e

By this time, the poor
steward . was getting ex-

tremely edgy. Now, he >
' hadn't.
1.1 Money, but. had. discovered.
over the years that nothing
- comes free.’ Not that he

‘any: aversion to

minded spending some time
‘in the sack with a charming

lady - but,. he’s neyer been |

given that much money for
openers. Maybe. she was
Some kind of freak.

‘The next night,
having skipped lunch and
‘breakfast, the lady ap-
peared. Since the ship was in
port for the evening, most of
‘the passengers. were on
shore. By this time, our

_ steward was very agitated.

He didn’t want to appear
anxious - but, he didn’t want
to appear stupid, either!

“Can you dance?” she
‘enquired.

“Yes, of course, Madam!”

“Will you take me to

dance?”

They met on the dock and
headed far the nearest
discotheque.. She slipped a
wad of-bills into his hand to
-pay for their expenses.

With visions of early”

retirement floating in his
brain, he outdid himself in

- the dance department. She

was extremely talented - but
froze whtn he touched her.
They did a lot of boogie until
dawn and then she shook his
hand and left.

Now, this guy was
PUZZLED. No _hand-to
hand combat. No sneaked
kisses. No propositons. A
handshake? And a few
hundred dollars? Unusual, to
say the least!

At dinner, the next night,
her seat was empty. He was
concemed. No steward loses
a high-rolling passenger
without wondering if he'd
done something _ terribly
wrong. Cautious questions to

again ..

“Yes, of course, Madam!”

the Maitre Fi didn’ t help - he
didn’t know where she \ was,
_gither.

‘Well, one can’t live in ne
past. If she was gone, she.

was pone. And he was nearly,
“$500 richer. But; humans

beings being curious, he

kept on asking questions —-

until he finally got the an-.

‘swer!

‘She: was removed from the

ship by a hupe black -
limousine. Was.her name
And did she -
return to Greece by Olympic »

Airways? Or, was she an. .

Christina?

escaped lunatic?

The following year, he was

teansferred to another ship, -
,cruising another part of the .

Mediterranean. In the late
evening, the stewards gather

in the crew quarters for wine -

and conversation. }

One young dining room
steward was raving about his
last passenger - she tipped
‘him $100 every night and he
took her dancing. A few
careful questions convinced

my friend that this must be |

his mystery lady!

._ “Then what happened?”
he asked anxiously. “Did she:
leave the s
of the a

“Oh, no,” replied the
other steward. “I am such a
poor dancer that I suggested
we retire to a hotel for
another type of en-
tertainment. That, at least, I
am good at!” And, he added
rather smugly, “I spent the
remaining nights of the
cruise in her cabin.
Delightful!”

“f My friends was almost in .

tears as he told me the story.
“You see, Barbara? ‘All those
years I spent learning to be a

. good dancer - and just look

where it got me!”

I nodded,
pathetically.

sym-

“Amd, even worse, Bar-
bara! If she was paying $100
for just serving the soup - ai-
yi-yil”

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4

errors Ci

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