ence Friday, May 17, 1991 ~ North Shore News -— 7 Childcare: home is still where the heart is human liberation is all about. I RECENTLY, a friend was over for lunch and our conver- sation turned to the subject of childcare. The subject is close to both of our hearts — my friend has a 13-month- old daughter and I have a seven-month-old son. My friend confessed that, hav- ing now had a child of her own, She felt a certain sense of guilt at what she had thought in the past about mothers who had made the decision to stay home with their children. I admitted to feeling the same sense of guilt over thoughts about women I felt had put their brains on the top shelf to take up diaper-rinsing; women who had pulled off the career track and dropped out of the ongoing battle for greater access to jobs, greater respect in those jobs and equal pay for work of equal value. How could these women do it? How could that friend in Edmon- ton who had a senior government job, who had held her own in a sea of hopeless male chauvinists (with whom I had also worked), give it up to look after two pre- school daughters? How could my cousin who went to journalism school with me, one of the best writers I know and a successful CBC radio producer, leave her career completely to care for her son and daughter unti! they started school? I now know why. child. I have a By Catherine Atyeo Contributing Writer Before you write me off as some born-again mother who has gone back to the 1950s through the miracle of childbirth, let me make one thing clear: I am not anti-daycare, or childcare in its various forms other than that which is given by parents. There is an indisputable need for quality childcare in this country and any- one who argues against that has his or her head in the sand. As media relations coordinator for the 1986 Special Parliamentary Committee on Childcare, I travel- led with seven MPs to 34 Cana- dian cities for public hearings. I heard virtually every argument that can be made on the subject of childcare. I believe politicians have to wake up and accept that Canadian society has changed and that it is no longer acceptable to make pol- icy based on the Leave-It-To- Beaver family model. I consider it a disgrace that B.C. is the oniy province in Canada that does not provide operating grants to childcare cen- MAILBOX Admitting al-Mashat a disturbing trend Dear Editor: I was almost apoplectic to learn that Mohamed al-Mashat was not only allowed into Canada but as a resident of North Vancouver. {1 know that an ambassador is someone who is sent abroad to ‘lie for his country’’ but this did not make his justification of Sad- dam Hussein’s aggression in Kuwait any less nauseating. | think he really believed what he said. Someone’s head in the Cana- dian Embassy in Vienna should roll. The government has said that it did not know about this until the visa was issued. Someone is either lying or the government has lost control of the immigra- tion process. Here we have a man who is ap- parently close to, and an ardent supporter of, the ‘‘Butcher of Baghdad.’’ Saddam Hussein ranks, in terms of evil incarnate, with Hitler and Stalin (though his genocide so far has not reached the same scale) and is arguably the worst environmental terrorist the world has ever known. The reported statement by a member of the Canadian-Arab Federation that getting this man is ‘ta feather in Canada’s cap’’ disgusts me as much as the sup- portive statements of MP Chuck Cook, who will no doubt lose a few thousand votes as a result. What is most disturbing is that if Mohamed al-Mashat can be given the VIP treatment by our “public servants,’’ can we trust the government, at some time in the future, not to welcome with Open arms, Tariq Azziz (the Iraqi Foreign Minister), Saddam Hus- scin’s son-in-law (the ‘‘victor’’ of the Halabja poison gassing of in- nocent Kurdish civilians), and even Saddam Hussein himseif? Due to our siupid !aws, any of these could arrive illegally, claim refugee status, and we would have to let them in. The whole motley crew belongs in front of an_ international Nuremburg style tribunal charged with crimes against humanity. That their faithful apologist and lackey, Mohamed ai-Mashat, should be considered a suitable immigrant, makes me and many of my friends feel absolutely para- lytic with rage. We should rescind his visa and throw the man out back to Baghdad where he belongs. Sadly, our government does noi have the guts to do this. Now that he has his house up for sale, he will hopefully no longer sully the streets of North Vancouver. Robert J. Brown North Vancouver Al-Mashat has good taste! Dear Editor: I wish to commend the good taste of Mohamed al-Mashat in originally selecting North Van- couver as a new home in Canada for himself and his family. The legalities of his move to this country is not the purpose of this letter, but } deplore the media invasion of his privacy. Our leafy, beflowered North Shore tranquility would have been refreshing after the chaotic, torrid Gulf situation. Marian Hale North Vancouver tres. And | continue to be depressed that childcare workers are among the tlowest-paid employees in the country. Buc as a parent in this society, while calling for change, } have to accept the reality and do what is best for my child. The reality is that there is a Jot of sub-standard childcare out there ~— I’ve heard enough childcare horror stories from friends and acquaintances to know this is true. But I also believe there’s an even more basic reality: no other childcare giver can replace a loving mother or father in a child’s impressionabie and highly vulnerable life. In the heat of the childcare debate — and in my travels with the committee I saw Real ‘Vomen ‘tand daycare advocates almost come to physical blows — | offer the following thought: while there are women who don’t have any choices about childcare, there are still women who can make choices. I remember one day in the committee’s travels when we were taking a bus to the next town for hearings. I was talking to one of the researchers who was travelling with the committee, a man who was working on a PhD in childcare. He suddenly stopped talking childcare theory and said quietly to me, “Of course, what a lot of People won't admit is that for some people it's a matter of priorities.”’ Priorities mean making choices. A child doesn't require that you own aS opposed to rent your home. A child doesn’t require that the family live in a 5,000-square- foot dream home as opposed to a 2,000-square-foot bungalow. A child doesn't require that you make senior partner in your firm. A child only requires your caring interest and love. Pm afraid that as women, we've somehow bought the idea that we don't have to. set priorities. Yin baffled by endless magazine articles that profile the latest ver- sion of Superwoman who ‘‘wants it all” or ‘‘has it all,’? meaning she has managed to combine a spectacularly successful career with being a mother, and nobody or nothing is lacking. Hogwash. For a lot of women, it has to come down to a balancing act be- tween their children’s needs and their job. And yes, though no- body may want to admit it, priorities can enter into decisions. The friend in Edmonton and my cousin from journalism school have opted for more modest lifestyles in the interests of their children. They’re not heroines — they’ve just made certain choices. I respect every woman’s right to choose —- that, after all, is what ~ Why should al-Mashat get special treatment? Dear Editor: A few years ago my cousin, a career officer with the British Foreign Office and at the time private secretary to the British High Commissioner to Singapore, applied to the Ca- nadian Immigration depart- ment for entry to Canada. This application was denied. My cousin holds various degrees, is multilingual, in- cluding French, and has served in embassies all over the world. She is a highly qualified execu- tive secretary and would have been an asset (o this country. You can imagine my disgust when I learned recently that Mohamed al-Mashat, the ex- Iraqi ambassador and apologist for Saddam Hussein’s policies, had been granted immigrant status and planned to live in North Vancouver. This is equivalent to Von Ribbentrop being allowed to enter Canada after the Second World War. I.M. Forrest North Vancouver just know that as soon as I became pregnant I! was aware of the awesome responsibility I had to my child. 1 knew that my job as a consul- tant in a national public relations firm paled in relation to my re- sponsibility to ensure that this lit- tle human being got the best start in a world that seems a hell of a lot less secure than the one I entered in the '50s. I knew that 1 didn’t want to miss his first year, and | dida’i need child development experts to tell me this is the most important year for learning in an individual's life. Arcd f knew that no matter how good the care giver — and for the sake of parents who need outside care givers, I hope there are a lot of good ones ~— no other care giver can give to my child the same attention, enthusiasm and love that I can. So Pll rifle through the news- papers and read a page or two of my novel when I can, and accept that I’m not making a contribu- tion to the rent anymore. I’m not worried about losing ground in my career — I know now that my brain isn’t going to turn to pablum and that, if I want it, I can get a career back some day. I’m just grateful that, unlike some women, I’m lucky enough to have the opportunity to make choices. MR.MASHAT WILL BE NO DRAIN ON THE CANADIAN GINT ass ey AND WIL. PROBABLY | BOAT F$HORE PES News Mailbox policy LETTERS TO the editor must in- clude your name, written legibly, your full address and telephone number. Due to space constraints the News cannot publish all letters. Published letters may be edited for brevity, clarity, accuracy, le- gality and taste.