38 - Sunday, December 27, 1987 - North Shore News Lifestyles__ MISS MANNERS SLAMS RECIPIENTS Family speechiess about card DEAR MISS MANNERS - Our entire family was left speechless again this Christmas, when we once again receiv- ed a , Christmas greeting from a relative, a **professional man’? (an optometrist), on which his id-year-old daughter did the artwork. The entire family agrees that we have all seen lovelier scribblings and finger-paint smears rendered ERECT miss manners by Judith Martin by preschoolers. The girl’s father photocopies on his office machine this abhorrent drawing of a girl standing by a Christmas tree and a fireplace hung, with stockings; he wrote ‘Merry Christmas’? and signed the family names on: the bottom, using his worst handwrit- ing. He mailed a copy of this garbage ‘to all the people on_ his Christmas-card list, in used envelopes, crossing out the previous sender’s return address and sticking on his own “Dr. and Mrs.”’ return label. This relative can afford to send out the most expensive Christmas card available, with all the engrav- ings and embellishments. Howev- er, he has mailed out trash like this for the past several years. I think the man is under the mistaken im- Pression that his daughter is a brilliant artist, and he is trying to show off her work. I agree that sending hand-painted or hand- drawn cards would be thoughtful and individualized; however, his photocopies of work done by such an untalented artist do not fall into this category. All who receive them are disgusted, insulted and infuriated by such gauche greetings, but are unsure of how to tell the sender. Do you think it would be best to advise him that he is cheapening the custom of greetings, and to delete him from our lists, or should we write “‘Refused’’ and “Return to sender’’ on the envelopes? GENTLE READER — Whose family are you — Raphael’s? Miss Manners cannot think of another explanation for the bizarre notion that only fine artwork may be sent through the mails at Christmas time, and that fail:ne to meet the family taste level should be met with a declaration of war. As a matter of fact, the taste scale of Christmas greetings always places family drawings above pur- chased cards. Artistic talent is con- sidered irrelevant; family feeling is supposed to replace cold aesthetic judgment. Try that on your branch of the family. DEAR MISS MANNERS — Hav- ing - followed instructions and taught a child to write thank-you notes, I call on Miss Manners for help in dealing with an unexpected side effect. My daughter, now 6, writes her own notes and expresses delight in most gifts, even new toothbrushes, so it is fun to give her presents. Her grandmother and godmother enjoy it so much they give her sev- eral gifts each month. I have tried to remove the least favorite toys, but I feel heartless at best, and she now regularly checks all wastebaskets and bookshelf tops. It must be inappropriate to blame others for 2 domestic pro- blem, but what is the proper perspective? GENTLE READER — First: May Miss Manners borrow your child for a short while? She wants to trot her around the country saying to all the other little children: “You see what happens when you write thank-yous? Do you begin to understand what an investment that is?’’ ; We won’t tell them of the other result — your perfectly reasonable Coles : having a January furniture sale, desire to end this flow of booty. Miss Manners thinks it admirable; she just doesn’t want to sabotage the lesson she is teaching the others. But your daughter is also ready for advanced etiquette. You have taught her the joy of receiving, and now you might try teaching her the Y joy of giving. It is cruel to con- fiscate toys she already has become attached to, but before a major in- flux of presents, you could suggest that she have the fun of choosing what she wants to keep and what she can give to other children say through a hospital or other in- stitution. UR QUICK OIL CHANGE CENTR _NO APPOINTMENT NECESSARY EEE Bring in this ad for $3.00 off. LONSDALE SHELL RAPID LUBE Lonsdale at 18th 987-7233 but then so — are a lot of . other stores . And The Time is Now To Purchase Fine Quality: Furnishings From Our Gallery | During Our January Clearance _.. but they aren't selling. the good stuff. 9 Piece Dining Room Set Reg. $17,999.00 Sale $8,999.00 " Sofa - Reg. $1,999.00 Sale *959.00 3 Piece Wall Unit - Reg. $9,595.00 hy a HOURS: Monday to Saturday 9-5 y.m., Sunday Noon to 5 p.m. Sale £4,399.00 7 Everything in the . Gallery is _on Sale. GALLERY. 4240 Manor St., Burnaby, B.C. 4 block West of Villa Sheraton » Horeld , YSESSCRIRSEAES SDE Os toe vio te ff ERED tei AN a 0th nan intainen Bommerance Rae ptunnnnet hh SUL arte ie unin