QUESTION: I en-
thusiastic, energetic, and
lively. I am very active in
every imaginable way.
Friends keep saying I am.a
going concern. I don’t
rm one. of those =
overly. excitable peop
just have to be on the
there’s .no . doubt ‘that I ‘ex
perience a lot’more in an

one day than a lot of ;

know. Don’t get me wrong,:
Pm not just «. bouncy ball of.
fluff because I think Vhave. a

better than average mind.

and I.use it just .as en: =

thusiastically as I .usé my

oe a Ow

you what I'm like. I wait you

to know -something, else: x:
before I give you thé rest pF. .. 0.
the story and ask your ad- deadn

vice. The “something else”
fs that this high energy of
mine is not a problem to me, -
but is something I am happy

about and wouldn't change
for the world. I feel very
much alive and that’s the
way I want to be.

_ The sad part of my letter is

Poadremner’

three years. I had no idea he
was so lifeless. I knew he was
quiet and rather slow

(compared to me), but I did
not dream that any man
could be as lethargic and as
motionless as he is. He likes
to read a lot. Well so do I,

_ Freelance ‘Counsellor. Hayden Stewart may be reached at: 261-6242
for appointments for individual, family or group counselling. His
office in the International Plaza Hotel (Open Tuesdays only) is for the
convenience of North Shore residents.

but right now he is reading
“The Care of Roses” and
“Bacon's Essays"!!!

How can I live happily
with this semi-conscious do-

” little?

STEWART: Perhaps you
can’t. We have a good friend
whom we love dearly but

who only very rarely gets an
invite to our house because
she simply wears us out with
her enthusiasms. We're still
laughing about her ecstatic

and loud squeals of delight
when she saw how
beautifully the light from our
window was shining throu,

a glass of water she had
before her! Your husband
may look dead to you, but
perhaps he is running for
dear life to escape some of
your bubbling energy.

Dirty jokes can be embarrassing

QUESTION: How do you
react to dirty jokes? I have
troubles.

STEWART: I have a hang-
up about “crude” jokes of

the bathroom variety. Don't
enjoy them and probably
look like it. I laugh at sexy
jokes if they are funny. They
bother me if they are just
dirty for dirt’s sake. Don’t

enjoy them. I realize, on
thinking about it, that J am
very much aware of who is
present when a sexy joke is
told. I am_= really un-
comfortable if someone is

Problems are opportunities

QUESTION: Would you
care to comment on Hare's
Law of Small Problems, as
quoted by Noel Wright in
Sunday Brunch (Jan. 25)

STEWART: I wondered if
some fun-lover would write
me about that quotation.
Hare’s Law reads: “Inside
every large problem is a
small problem trying to get
out.” No doubt the writer of
the above query sees a
conflict between Hare’s Law
and our oft-mentioned
LOVE PRINCIPLES and is
needling me into saying

p

charge.

free make-up a
arle.

counter.

A
ROBERT
BRYAN

something about it. The
Love Principle related to the
thought behind Hare's Law is
“Perceive. Problems as
Opportunities”. Arleen
Lorrance of the Love Project
is the one who shared that
principle with us. I think it is
miles ahead of Hare's idea.
Try it out. If your general
idea of life has been that
every problem spawns
-another one, why not, in-
stead, start living your life on
the basis of secing op-
portunities in every
problem, large or small?
Don't start today. Start

tomorrow. In that way, I will,
be able to close this
facetious comment with
“Hare today gone
tomorrow.” (Should I be

—

PUNished for that one?)

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enny-

present who is embarrassed
by them. I don’t like being
there if ANYthing is pushed
at someone who doesn’t like
what is being pushed. And

that goes for what you have

called “dirty jokes” as well as
for Stock Market quotations,
scripture passages, hockey
scores, health food or North
Shore News columns headed

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' “quietness” to rub off on

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C15 - Sunday News, February 8, 1981

Perhaps if you cooled it a
bit, he would have the
courage to come alive again.
On the other hand, if that is
really truly your way and you
like yourself like that, you
need to be careful not to
deliberately change yourself

into something you are not. -

Can you talk with him?

Perhaps you'll find you love. —
each other enough to learn a ©:
balance - your
dissimilar natures. Do you.

way to
think you need a little of his

you? Do you suppose that

secretly he would like to ”

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sious-do-little’

have some of your energy?
Talk about it and see.

One rule for your talk:
both of you agree not to talk
about what's wrong with the
other one. Talk about what
each of you would honestly
like to do differently for the
sake of the happiness of your
rela ship. . - _

ST. THOMAS AQUINAS §

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