‘or ONE moore thing before I go: Only some of you are boncheads. For almost six years I've been banging away at this column, banging away 5 thick-skulls of drivers wi undersized brains. Lronically, those who most needed a good scolding were not get- ting the message. On the other hand, there has been a steady streams of letters almost from day one reading the likes of “Thanks for calling me a bonehead, i should know better,” « “Good job putting those boncheads in their place.” Naturally f prefer those types of letters, even though they obviously represent a case of preaching to the choir... Conversely, there have been a fair number of letters taking offence to a seemingly overzealous use of my numb- skull nomenclature and still others making a personal attack on my ability to read and extract quotations from the mighty Motor Vehicle signals chastise those folks who, by poor action or inaction, are ruining people lives either by crashing into them or just plain killing them. A most recent letter from Dave Perfitt suggested my column on how to cross the street properly, safely, was merely an example of “finger wagging” on the part of yours truly and that my “wan- ton use of the word ‘brain dead” describing poor pedes- trian behaviour (was) some- what unproductive to the goal of making our roads safer.” Of course I’m finger wag- ging. That's been exactly the point of this column fron: the get-go. It’s my job; it’s what I do, I da not subscribe to the ed the impetus of very sharp and vital lessons and the fact of che matter is that my unremitting use of the word bonehead surely numbed the oxcasional reader to the jes- son at hand. Oops. Bad drivers kill people. fn truth, | always found “bone- head” to be atitde treble but it is untikely that | could have snuck “shit-for-brains™ past the editor week after week. Nevertheless, that’s what yor are should you choose to ignore even the most rudi mentary rules of the road. {f you choose not to signal you may very well cause con- fusion resuliing in a car crash long after you've left the area — not your problem. If you choose to ran a red and make it through just iine, you may be oblivious to the fact that a bus had co hit the binders and inadvertently lauc-ch some old fella down the aisle and into the fare box, teeth first. Why should you care? You're just a bone- head carrying on your merry way, oblivious and ignorant. I wag my finger because I encouraging letters and gen- eral comments. You're a fine choir. Pri not stopping my litde self-appointed crusade tor safer and better drivers and roads, Pin just done writing im Shambie’ QUIGLEY, our service writer, and I were at the office window, watching the first snowflake drift slowly down. He had his coffee cup in hand and looking at his watch, commented, “Should be any minute now." 1 blew on my mug of tea. “Hell be here. He hasn't missed a. year yet.” We were referring to Nervous Ned Twitchly, Ned was a jittery fellow who never planned ahead. The first hint of snow would find him scur- rying down to our shop in a GC, boneheats, and drive safe! about it. frwas fun while it lasted. Thanks tor the ride. Your obedient servant, Shaun Contin, Be sate. Shaan has aot completely teft the Open Road. His Virtual Driver column for speed- addicted gamers will continue ta appear in these pages on alternate Fridays. You may sill reach =obim ~~ ae , Act, as ifthe rules of the road = Ghandi School of Editorial cannot club people in the panic. simply are not so or do not Comment where they preach —_ head via a newspaper column. As the — meandering Quigley. “Looking for some front counter. “Two tires or apply to drivers with a surreal —_ patience and passive parley, no At any rate, I’ve had snowflake touched the pave- new tires?” . tour, Ned? Winter or All- sense of the common or who _ back-patting and tsk- tsk-tsk- enough and if ven ve had wit, Neds car screeched Still wheezing, Ned Season? Studded or ice have merely been driving for —_ing from me. I endeavens to cnough uf ine and my eame- onto the lot. He burst through = bobbed his head up and down, —_ Radial?” longer than I. tuake a strong point. ! pointa calling and finger wagging, the front door, gasping for “Looks like snow, ch?” I Ned stopped nodding. Too bad. The thing is, I meant to offend, mildly, or at least finger and cry foul. Admittediy, my own sense of crass humour often deflect- rejoice. To the rest, I'm grateful for the support and the Good Old Fashioned Full Service 15% off at our grocery market with ad* Best flowers Complete mechanical repaix. Large grocery and Best price 3 licenced mechanics, 6 Bays, confectionary sections. breath and failing his arms at our tire display. “Afternoon, Ned,” said added. He nodded faster. Quigley went behind the for 1° @ PER LITRE Reef te eM Le ay ie More - “What would you suggest?” he See Put next page 3 PORE Tr -_— ee. 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