this straight IN THE MESS that passes here for democracy, it is dif- ficult to sort things out, Nay, it is impossible to sort things out because Tweedledee, Tweediedum and Tweedletwerp are for the most part indistinguishable. Let’s play a little game for a moment, Who would you think this man is, and which party does he lead? He declared himself to be in- volved in ‘Shumankind'’, (Note the trendy noun, which for all advane- ed thinkers replaces‘‘Mankind’”’.) He wants fo increase foreign aid expenditures by 50 per cent, even though we are wasting $12.5 billion a year in communist basket cases like Ethiopia and Mozambi- que. He wants total sanctions against South Africa, and the severing of diplomatic relations with that country, which has done us no harm. He is against Cruise missile testing, and might even be per- suaded to declare the whole coun- 5139. | Choice of 6 Colours IG.AS LIFT CHAI try a ‘nuclear-free zone’’. He is against having a fleet of nuclear-powered submarines, and advocates *‘a new international regime’’ for the Arctic that “‘would bring all Arctic powers together in a multinational trea- ty.’ (That the Soviets and the Americans are unlikely to quit prowling around under the Arctic ice in exchange for vague benefits for ‘humankind’? does not seem to worry him. There is a left-wing vote out there and this guy wants it.) He recently damned amend- ments to the Immigration Act that would put some sort of brake, however gentle, on the flood of phoney refugees entering this country. Adjust, Back 5 Caster Base ‘Sim Catheart Chair- man He is fervently in favor of uni- versal immigration, meaning that English Canada should be submerged beneath a Third World food. He is against a free trade pact with the U.S. and howls that such a pact would spell the end of this country. He also claims that such a pact would pose a problem for women, His argument is incomprehensibte, but Ais comprehension is that free trade would ‘‘endanger the social programs that women require."’ He is against any kinds of curbs on social programs and can be relied upon to yell loudly when such are proposed. He thumped and jumped like mad when it was suggested that the rate of increase on old age pensions be reduced. Similarly, he is against any trimming of the universal baby bonus program, yea, even though millionaires receive baby bonuses. If the Tories propose to spend $8 billion on a crazy state baby- SHES eS Get Your Very Own Autographed Copy —— sitting program, he wants to spend even more, He wants richer minimum in- come programs and a full employment strategy — even though unemployment in the country as a whole is at its lowest level in years. When the last federal budget was brought down he complained it was a blueprint for two Canadas — one for the rich and one for the poor. He is in favor of official bilin- gualism, but has never been heard to uller &@ word of protest concern- ing the outrageous discrimination against English speakers in Quebec. When the scandalous Bill C-72 was being debated by Tory dissi- dents, he claimed — again incom- prehensibly — that changes in the Bill would ‘‘destroy minority fan- guage rights in Canada.” 9 - Wednesday, August 3, 1988 - North Shore News See our vast selection of books. HOUSE « TOOLS utc. 220 Donaghy Ave. North Vancouver, 8.C. (bloc south ot Dick twin) Meet SPIDER ROBINSON Author of New Release “TIME PRESSURE” 7-8 p.m. Friday August 5th at Save-On-Foods Receive 25% Off TIME PRESSURE 6 Reg. $4.75 Sale $33 But this man puts on a great act. He looks and talks just like that guy who used to come on in the TV ads saying, ‘I'm tough. I'm roughy-tough!"" In fact, even though he was a Rhodes Scholar and good at sports, he’s weak in the head, has no spine, and can be pushed in any direction. Some people are arm- chair politicians, but this guy is a wheelchair one. Hie also doesn’t know why he’s in politics. When a reporter asked him, back in 1984, he gave this brilliant answer: ‘That's a good question. Yep. A good question."” And again (shaking his head), ‘A good question."* Did you think for a while that I was talking about Ed Broadbent? l give you John Turner, the leader of what we are pleased to call the Opposition. Thank you. @ WOODWORKING TOOLS} & MACHINERY | for the discriminating woodworker. Tees 988-6657 | spilling over with unique 49TH AND 20TH CENTURY PINE, WALNUT, OAK, MAHOGANY AND FRUITWOOD European antiques and stone garden statuary