this straight

IN THE MESS that passes here for democracy, it is dif-
ficult to sort things out, Nay, it is impossible to sort things
out because Tweedledee, Tweediedum and Tweedletwerp
are for the most part indistinguishable.

Let’s play a little game for a
moment, Who would you think
this man is, and which party does
he lead?

He declared himself to be in-
volved in ‘Shumankind'’, (Note the
trendy noun, which for all advane-
ed thinkers replaces‘‘Mankind’”’.)

He wants fo increase foreign aid
expenditures by 50 per cent, even
though we are wasting $12.5
billion a year in communist basket
cases like Ethiopia and Mozambi-
que.

He wants total sanctions against
South Africa, and the severing of
diplomatic relations with that
country, which has done us no
harm.

He is against Cruise missile
testing, and might even be per-
suaded to declare the whole coun-

5139. |

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try a ‘nuclear-free zone’’.

He is against having a fleet of
nuclear-powered submarines, and
advocates *‘a new international
regime’’ for the Arctic that
“‘would bring all Arctic powers
together in a multinational trea-
ty.’ (That the Soviets and the
Americans are unlikely to quit
prowling around under the Arctic
ice in exchange for vague benefits
for ‘humankind’? does not seem
to worry him. There is a left-wing
vote out there and this guy wants
it.)

He recently damned amend-
ments to the Immigration Act that
would put some sort of brake,
however gentle, on the flood of
phoney refugees entering this
country.

Adjust, Back
5 Caster Base

‘Sim Catheart
Chair- man

He is fervently in favor of uni-
versal immigration, meaning that
English Canada should be
submerged beneath a Third World
food.

He is against a free trade pact
with the U.S. and howls that such
a pact would spell the end of this
country.

He also claims that such a pact
would pose a problem for women,
His argument is incomprehensibte,
but Ais comprehension is that free
trade would ‘‘endanger the social
programs that women require."’

He is against any kinds of curbs
on social programs and can be
relied upon to yell loudly when
such are proposed. He thumped
and jumped like mad when it was
suggested that the rate of increase
on old age pensions be reduced.

Similarly, he is against any
trimming of the universal baby
bonus program, yea, even though
millionaires receive baby bonuses.

If the Tories propose to spend
$8 billion on a crazy state baby-

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——

sitting program, he wants to spend
even more,

He wants richer minimum in-
come programs and a full
employment strategy — even
though unemployment in the
country as a whole is at its lowest
level in years.

When the last federal budget
was brought down he complained
it was a blueprint for two Canadas
— one for the rich and one for the
poor.

He is in favor of official bilin-
gualism, but has never been heard
to uller &@ word of protest concern-
ing the outrageous discrimination
against English speakers in
Quebec.

When the scandalous Bill C-72
was being debated by Tory dissi-
dents, he claimed — again incom-
prehensibly — that changes in the
Bill would ‘‘destroy minority fan-

guage rights in Canada.”

9 - Wednesday, August 3, 1988 - North Shore News

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But this man puts on a great act.
He looks and talks just like that
guy who used to come on in the
TV ads saying, ‘I'm tough. I'm
roughy-tough!""

In fact, even though he was a
Rhodes Scholar and good at
sports, he’s weak in the head, has
no spine, and can be pushed in any
direction. Some people are arm-
chair politicians, but this guy is a
wheelchair one.

Hie also doesn’t know why he’s
in politics. When a reporter asked
him, back in 1984, he gave this
brilliant answer: ‘That's a good
question. Yep. A good question."”
And again (shaking his head), ‘A
good question."*

Did you think for a while that I
was talking about Ed Broadbent?

l give you John Turner, the
leader of what we are pleased to
call the Opposition. Thank you. @

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