Mey,
ne

day.

We have three beautiful
children. [ feel really guilty com-
plaining when so many others
have so much less, but [ want
more. If I don't get some sexual
variety in our bedroom soon I am
going to cheat on her.

I want to enjoy oral sex with
her, but she is completely turned
off to the idea. She has only tried
to perform it on me once in our
marriage and has never let me try
it on her.

I am driven out of my mind
with fantasies of oral sex. I've
suggested a counselor for both of
us, but she won't go.

I even rented a ‘‘blue”’ movie
with an oral-sex scene, but she
locked herself in the bathroom
until 5 promised to turn it off. She
says it is ‘‘perversion.’’ What can
Ido?

A. You must sit her down and
tell her exactly what you have told
me.

Say ‘‘Honey, I love you, but |
am driven out of my mind with
these fantasties about oral sex. If
you won’t at least see a counsellor

44 — Wednesday, May 15, 1991 ~ North Shore News

Dr.
Westheimer

ASK DR. RUTH

with me, | can't promise I will be
abie to remain faithful.”’

When she understands how
much this means to you, she will
surely agree to talk to someone

about the situation. If she doesn’t,-

20 alone!
Many couples do enjoy oral sex.

e wants more than faithful wife

Q. 1 HAVE a good, caring, faithful wife who after more
than 20 years of marriage says she loves me more each

It is not a perversion. You should
not feel guilty about wanting a
richer sex life.

Q. My best friend has been go-
ing out with a guy for ently three
weeks. Not too long ago, she and
I both agreed it is dumb to have
sex with 2 man until you've been
together at least six weeks.

Now f discover she had sex with
him on the first date. IT can't
believe what a hypocrite she is!

I'in worried about her. He's 30,
almost 10 years older than she is,
so he’s surely been around.

She could catch something from
him. What can I say to her to
make her understand how foolish

she is to have sex with a man,
especially an older man, _ this
soon?

A. Nothing! It really is none of
your business when your friend
has sex with a man.

Limit your comments to a sim-
ple, ‘‘I hope you always use con-
doms with a new partner until you
both decide to have a
monogamous relationship.’’ Then
keep your mouth shut!

I hope you atco use condoms
with a new partner, no matter
how long you wait to have sex

North Van City releases heritage video

THE CITY of North Vancouver is
releasing a newly completed video
entitled ‘‘The City of North Van-
couver — Our Heritage
Remembered.”

This video is a 30-minute
journey into the city’s past. Start-
ing with the development of
Moodyvville, the video goes on to
highlight the city’s progress
through to the Second World
War. Current and historic images
are interspersed to reveal examples
of what remains of the city’s
heritage.

The purpose of the video is to

USE YOUR
HEAD, SAVE
YOUR HEART.
\s
lf you're
overweight, lighten
up and take a
load off your heart.

©

bnproving
your odds
against
nada’s
#1 killer.

For heartening information, call

1-800-663-2010

HEART
ND STROKE
HON OF
BC & YUKON

increase awareness about the city’s
heritage and the potential for its
future.

This video has been produced
by the city’s heritage advisory
committee in conjunction with the
Media Resources Department of
Capilano College. The students
responsible for the project were
Christine Doyle, Melissa Parker
and Kirstin Shaw.

The video will be shown on
Shaw Cable on May [7 at 9 a.m.

Why is MARY a friendly, ex-
pressive person with a good
sense of humour and a strong
stubborn streak?

Why is DEBBIE versatile,
clever, yet attracts people who
take advantage of ner? Why
does she suffer nervous tension,
explosive ternper, and tosses in
her life?

Why does PAUL desire
system and order in his life and
still he is active and restless,
which take him into change and
instability, making him subject to
frustration, irritation, and critical
thoughts?

Your name creates the way
you think, and therefore your
life's experiences. A PER-
SONAL NAME REPORT will
prove to you the influence your
name has had in your life. What
is mere impcctant, there is a

The quality of your life is in your name!

PLAN TO ATTEND A FREE PRESENTATION
7:30 p.m. TUESDAY MAY 21st

KABALARIAN PHILOSOPHY

§912 Oak St., at 43rd Ave., Vancouver

Arrangements are also being
made to have the video available

for loan at public libraries,
schools and other locations
throughout the community.

Copies of ‘“‘The City of North
Vancouver — Our Heritage
Remembered”’ can also be pur-
chased at city hall for $15.

For more information on this
video or the city’s heritage pro-
gram, contact Gary Penway at ci-
ty hall, (985-7761, local 216).

way to change the characteris-
tics that you would like to
eliminate so they will no longer
cause trouble in your life and
keep you from being truly hap-
py. Many thousands have
already proved this. and you can
too.

The Law of Name Analysis is
not just something someone in-
vented, it is a Mathematical Prin-
cipte that has always existed —
like the Law of Gravity, it is a
natural Jaw and works whether
someone knows it or not.

Discover how YOUR NAME
affects your life — phone
736-2875, 8:30 to 4:30
weekdays, and receive a free,
brief name analysis. Learn how
to be what you CAN be, and ex-
perience the happiness that
comes with being the AEAL
you!

f CLOTHS

with him — and no matter if he is
older, younger or the same age as
you are.

If you think younger men won't
give you a sexually transmitted
disease because they haven't been
sexuaily active as long as a 30-year-
old, you ere wrong. So be careful
yourself, and keep your nose out
of your friend's business!

Q. Last month I told my wife I
sometimes fantasize about other
women while we're having sex.
She hasn't made love to me since.

I um shocked at her reaction,
We have always prided ourselves
on being well-informed, literal,
intelligent people who have a real-
istic attitude toward sex.

From time te time we tell each
other ‘‘sex secrets’’ and this was
the secret I chose to share with
her.

In the past, our lovemaking has

always been enlivened by such
sharing of ‘taboo’ thoughts and
past actions. Whe weuld have
thought she’d react like this?

[I don’t know how to get back
in her good graces, nol to mention
her bed. She's put me in the guest
room. Any ideas?

A. Tell her you were exag-
gerating the extent of your fan-
tasizing because you thought it
would excite her. Say. ‘In the
past, sharing secrets has always
enlivened our lovemaking. I didn’t
have any good secrets Ieft to
share, so 1 decided to take the
common practice of fantasizing
and exaggerate to excite you.””

Hopefutly, she will believe you.
And perhaps you could sneak
back into her bed at night and
begin making Sove to her while
she’s still asleep. She doesn’t lock
the door, does she?

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