34 - Sunday, June 3, 1990 - North Shore News

MY Liresty.es

Son must write
his own letters

DEAR MISS MANNERS - I
am enclosing a sample of a
card printed with the words
‘*Thank you for your
thoughtfulness and your gift
of money,” with my son’s
name. I got these cards to
use as a thank-you to those
people who were kind
enough to send my son
money for his high-school
graduation.

I know my son, and I was aware
that if I relied on tim to hand-
write his thank-you notes, they
weuild never get done. What would
be better, this or no thank-you at
all?

I typed labels for each of the
kind people who sent presents, and
he signed the cards and sent them
off.

I received back in the mail one
of the cards with the iabel torn off
and a message typed on it: ‘‘This is
really shabby ... Keep your
thanks!!!"" The envelope was also
typed, so the sender is unknown to
me, or I would cait and apologize
for thelr finding the form of the
note offensive.

Now I am concerned that others
might have been offended, and I
wonder if I should send a message
ef apology to everyone. My hus-
band and I fcel embarrassed and
wish to rectify the situation, if you
think it would be the right thing to
do.

miss
manners
Judith Martin

GENTLE READER - Miss
Manners appreciates your desire to
do the right thing, even in response
to a rude reaction to your well-
meant blunder, but she is not sure
that you are prepared to hear what
the right thing really is.

The right thing is to make your
son write the letters. He need not
apologize directly, but can start
each letter by saying, ‘‘I wanted to
thank you personally ...”’

Never mind that you know your
son, aiid he'll never do it. You are
the parents, and moralizing, nagg-
ing and supervising are your tasks.

“ALCOHOL « DRUG - CO-DEPENDENCY
PROBLEM?

HN se

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