tie 4A a a. . : a “ . - _ 28 - Sunday, March 2, 1986 - North Shore News Travel politely with pet friends DEAR MISS MANNERS — J am a young, single, work- ing-class male who owns two dogs. These dogs are my friends, and | enjoy travelling with them. miss manners by Judith Martin Dn Some relatives are not dog fans, and object to my visits with the dogs, but I do not wish to kennel them for an absence. The dogs are crate-trained, and crate-content in my brief absences. I do not mind taking a room, or sleeping in a basement or truck. I understand that this is a diverse world, and that some people own cats oc just don't tike dogs. I’m not a fanatic; I just want to take care of my friends. What is the etiquette here? In visits of more than two or three days, is it impolite to suggest, volunteer or usurp household chores? I state at the outset that I wish lo pay for my keep’s trouble. I back off if the host declines, but I sincercly want to pay for my keep. I won't offer to clean the bathroom, but I wil} gladly cook or mow the lawn. 1m bored easily. I'm not in- sulting or patronizing, it’s just that accepting the largess of those who are not friends, but kind acquain- tances, has always been difficult for me. GENTLE READER — As your attitude seems reasonable, Miss Manners has decided to allow you to get away with the idea of classi- fying your pets as full-fledged friends. Qne does not, however, bring along any sort of uninvited friends when making visits. One does not even request to be allowed to do so. What one does to cadge such an invitation is to say, ‘‘No, I’m sorry, I can’t stay with you, because I'll be travelling with my dogs,’' and then fall silent, so that the prospective host m , if he wishes, reply, ‘‘Oh, for heaven's sake, that's no problem. Bring them along."’ The question of compensating hosts for their hospitality is a sep- arate problem. As kindly as you mean it, you will offend people by offering them money. A friend’s home may not be properly treated as a hotel. The correct methods of compen- sation are: 1. Being helpful. This means that you not only clean up after yourself (and your friends), but cheerfully offer to help around the house. You can’t go so far as to usurp chores, but you may say with conviction, ‘‘I’d love to cook for you tonight’’ or ‘Let me mow the lawn. [ need the exercise, and | would really enjoy it.’”’ 2. Asking them out (and in- sisting on paying for it), ‘tOh, come on, Iet's go out tonight. Show me a restaurant that you like.” 3. Sending a present. This can either be a luxury item of food ot drink, or anything you feel, after staying in the house, would be ac- cepted with pleasure. Miss Man- ners only asks that if you decide it should be a dog, you check with them first. Not everybody wants a live-in friend. weld like to na _ who's coming to -. Savannah, Stephanie's, H Shoes, A many more! Over 190 Fabulous - including evr. North Va 935 Marin Capilano Le Chateau. R&A Records, Attention Import Car Owners Welch 1 525 Street isan" North Vancouver G. TR VW META Volyo Targa Performance British & Continental Motors 984-4338 985-9181 Chris or Robert Chris or Brent We perform Quality work at Competitive Rates. We also feature a completely stocked parts department and offei full auto body & IC.BC. repair service. We are an authorized Pirelli Tire dealer for the North Shore. Tat Tn cel Nee] Shops and Services fi 3 a TULA! S.27p PS, BATE Sears 990-8561 neouver