uf 46 - Wednesday, May 15, 1985 - North Shore News Friendly dinners have suspicious end who fives out of town is frequently sent on D EAR MISS MANNERS —A good friend business trips which include this area. On these occasions, we go out to dinner, each of us pay- ing his own share of the bill (which, for convenience, is one tab). It has come to my atten- tion that my friend was pay- ing the entire bill with his credit card, or if we pay in cash, he will take a copy of the receipt for his expense account. Apparently he is submitting the entire amount for reimbursement, of which I see none. Am I justified in feeling that I'am being taken advan- tage of, along with his com- pany, or, if his actions are unintentional, how should I get the message across without hurting his feelings? GENTLE READER — Which message? That he is being dishonest, or that he should cut you in on the take? Neither is something one can tell a friend, of whom you are obliged to think the best (even though Miss Manners firmly agrees with you that the practice is suspicious and, if your in- terpretation is correct, despicable). Your only pro- tection would be to request separate checks. Let us nevertheless hope that your friend only puts on the expense account that portion of the bill he has ac- tually paid, using the receipt only for evidence of that. DEAR MISS MANNERS -— My father passed away over a year ago. At that time, my neighbor cried, because her father had recently had a VOGUE by Judith coronary bypass operation. (My father died of a heart attack.) She was very nice to me, cooking supper for me after the funeral. Other neighbors sent sympathy cards. I was very toucked by this. This month, my mother passed away, the silence here has been deafening. i don’t understand why no onc has acknowledged or expressed sympathy. I really don’t expect that much from people, but I find this incun- sistency disturbing and self- ish, as both psrents were equally loved by me. Besides the pain of Joss to the bereaved, the lack of . ABOVE-GROUND FOOLS Extra thick interior ma 6 exterior vinyl finishes - 7. Ea & tup rail provides safety R : & years of satisfaction. 9 sizes in Round & Oval From $1,699. mt SCOTTSDALE BY MALLIN # «4 Viny! strap stacking chairs, glass top table, 81/2' matching umbrella with base $999, e Matching chaise $299 | BioGuarc Vancouver's largest selection of patio furniture, pools, spas & water chemicals. me Ot SON BURNABY 2927 Norland Avenue/294-1194 yor etiquette, manners of whatever, regarding what fo say to the bereaved or sen- ding cards or flowers is a pain one can do without. 1 hope you will discuss this to prevent it from happening to others. GENTLE READER — On the evidence of the one neighbor's behavior, Miss Manners was prepared to join your cry about self- ishness, because it sounded as if only that lady’s im- mediate identification with your situation prompted her kindness, rather than the urge to comfort you. Before she bemoans this, however, you must promise her that you gratefully ac- knowledged all the gestures 0 Vet we Wy Oy ga\ Felala ee g i=} ge HOME FURNISHINGS Warehouse/Showroom OPEN TO THE PUBLIC, {2 biks. behind the Avalon)’ at 1075 Roosevelt Cres., N.Van, 12-4 Sin 9O0-O1 38 Gross dr 2 year warranty 5599, 4-Manobloc lacquered resin chairs 1-40" Circular table ___ 6¥2' Umb Umbrella with base Weber one-touch ce Kettle. Exclusive “One-Touch™" lever operates all 3 vents & sweeps out ashes to elimin- seo $199 ROAST HOLDER With purchase of the above. Keep your pool sparkling clean with - BioGuard pool chemicals. Authorized BioGuard water testing centre. Oy RICHMOND Bridgeport & Smith/270-7803 vse TSAWWASSEN 5670 - 12 Avenue/943-0195 NORTH VANCOUVER Marine & Pemberton/984-9567 MON.-SAT.9:30-6:00/SUN. 11-5 ae C2 oe EF me I ae MO er LF re I vr Sg E> eB that were made to you. If she finds out that only she, and not the neighbors, know how touched you were, she will feel sadly misled. DEAR MISS MANNERS — My wife and I are both graduating from medical Features and Specifications school, and are both in the military. Are we: 1. Mr. and Mrs, 2. Dr. and Mrs. 3. Dr. and Dr. 4. 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