LIFESTYLES

Wednesday, January 2, 1991 - North Shore News - 44

Marriage consummation still disturbs woman

Q. 1 AM afraid this may
sound foolish, but the fol-
lowing situation has been a
source of great pain to me
for years.

In 1955 I was married in Italy
to an American man. I was a
virgin, but our wedding night was
spoiled because he dida't believe 1
was. There was no divod. The

Dr. Ruth
Westheimer

ASK DR. RUTH

had fooled him.

absence of blood convinced him I!

Perhaps 1 am being melodra-
matic, but 1 think this incident
foreshadowed our marriage. We
came to his country, where I
became a citizen shortly after the
marriage.

We had two children, then we
recently divorced, ending a not-
very-satisfactory relationship. All
our years together 1 felt hurt by
his distrust of me.

Do you think | am right that
this doomed our marriage from
the staré? Have you ever en-
countered 2 similar situation?

A. Over the vears J have heard
from many women who were
virgin brides though they did not
bleed upon consummating the
marriage. This is far more com-
mon than you think!

Many women do not bleed

because the hymen has been stret-
ched or even broken long before
the marriage. An active little girl
may break her hymen before she
enters puberty.

While it is sad and disappoin-
ting that your husband did not
believe you, | wouldn’t blame the
divorce on this one incident. Most
important, forget it now and
move on with your life.

Saturday

oF

Extra Savings Wednesday to

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