30 - Sunday, August 14, 1988 - North Shore News

stam cm om ew

ADDRESSING

THE PORTER

on’t call

DEAR MISS MANNERS — On a recent trip to Europe, my GENTLE READER — Why Miss
husband occasionally addressed waiters, porters and those Manners should advise you how to

giving assistance as ‘‘Sir.”” 1 know he was trying to be
helpful, friendly and pleasant,

GENTLE READER -~ Your hus-
band found porters? Where in
Europe? Miss Manners would slike
to take her vacation there.

Manners
Judith Martin

It is true that ‘‘sir’? is the mode
used toward the person being serv-
ed, not the one doing the serving.
It is more common to resort to the
incorrect usage in America, where
we have no terms for designating
service people of unknown names,
than in Europe, where there are
such terms.

However, if you must choose
some Canadianism for which to be
embarrassed abroad, Miss Man-
ners would suggest finding some-
thing less good-natured than exag-
gerated respect.

DEAR MISS MANNERS — We

§ Now you can plan your
shopping ahead, and
|| save more in the

bargain

If you miss any of these flyers.
call the North Shore News
Distribution Department

SUNDAY swore

but I feel this is not correct.

just returned from the funeral of a
close family member. As part of
the post-wake activities, we
assisted the bereaved in sorting and
answering cards, etc.

To our surprise, many checks
were sent, Some were donations to
a selected charity, but most were
directly for the bereaved. Several
family members said that the
bereaved should keep those funds
not directly given to the charity.
GENTLE READER ~— You do
not say if the survivors were left
destitute, but even if that were the
case, friends who wished to help
should suggest organizing a fund,
rather than merely sending un-
solicited checks.

Miss Manners believes that the
contributors intended their checks
to be used for the designated char-
ity. She does so in preference to
the horrible idea that they thought
deaths, like marriages, require
some sort of present.

And she utterly refuses to
speculate on what sort of bereaved
people could contemplate profiting
from the occasion.

DEAR MISS MANNERS — Is it
proper to use one’s business credit
card to pay for one’s friends’ din-
ner, and pocket their dinner
money? We think it’s tacky.

By taking our money, they are
Profiting, because the business is
reimbursing them. We would
rather pay the restaurant,

We have told our friends our
feelings, but they disregard this
and continue their practice. When
we suggested using our regular
charge card, they resented it. We
have stopped having dinner with
them because of this.

* Delivered to selected
areus only

986-1337]

FIRST IN FLYERS ON THE NORTH SHORE }

‘sir’?

dine with thieves in good con-
science, she doesn’t know. But the
way to do it is insist beforehand on
separate checks.

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