CALIFORNIA, 30 MILLION people, eighth largest economy on the planet, has a government which has run out of all money and is now handing out IQUs instead of cheques. The last time this state couldn’t pay its bills was 1936. Awful, you say? Ominous? Fear not. By the usual government practice of lying, cheating and stealing, California will soon pro- duce a spurious balanced budget and life will go on as before. To learn how this is done, we are indebted to Joel Auchenbach, author of the book Why Things Are. Mr. Auchenbach is, oh joy, oh rapture, a non-economist. There are no people better qualified to explain economics. Most of his, book is not about either economics or politics but to an- swer “every essential question of life.” These include how many orgasms a middle-aged woman may experience in an hour (it de- pends), whether we can keep guillotined heads alive (yes, but the IQ is deplorable) — and why we can’t ride zebras as we do horses. - It is his report on the U.S. fed- eral government budget lies which will prove so helpful to the California finance department. They must do what the American federal government has done. Twice in recent years, Congress passed laws requiring that their budgets be balanced. Budget defi- cits increased both times. Congress is now considering amending the American constitu- Paul St. Pierre PAULITICS & PERSPECTIVES tion to require balanced budgets but even if this should pass, it can be evaded by creative accounting. So, equally, can California pre- tend to a balanced budget instead of actually drawing one up as if it were serious. Mr. Auchenbach lists four methods, every one of which is distressingly familiar to Cana- dians. Although it may be clear that expenditure will exceed income in the budget, this can be offset by pretending that some of the ex- penditures are not budget items. In Washington, the government does not count U.S. Postal Service losses for budget purposes. The reason given is that the postal service has a degree of autonomy, although the autonomy doesn’t extend to paying its own deficits. The deficits come out of the U.S. (sshsssssh) budget. No British Columbian who has watched provincial government financing of the past 40 years can be surprised by this trick. Victoria has long declined to call the debts of B.C. Hydro or B.C. Railway by their proper name. They are called contingent liabilities. The author of Why Things Are calls this system ‘‘A Billion Dollar Debt Not Counted is a Billion Dollars Earned.”’ . The United States carried this idea to new, undreamt of heights last budget when it announced that the debt for bailing out the failed savings and loans com- panies was not a debt for budgetary purposes. That non- debt is estimated at up to half a trillion dollars. How much is half a trillion dollars? Don’t even attempt to imagine. | The second method of reducing a budget deficit isto sell. publiciy-owned capital assets and pretend that the money received is income. Again, we need'no Amer- ican examples, we have them handy here at home. When Ot- tawa sold part of Petrocan, when the B.C. government sold its numerous capital holdings, none of the money received was treated as capital. Pulp mill charged with violations HOWE SOUND Pulp and Paper Ltd. faces numerous pollution charges following three separate investigations by the B.C. environment ministry in June and August of 1991. The company has been charged with three counts under the pro- vincial Waste Management Act and an additional two counts under the federal Fisheries Act. The investigations involved allegations of pulp mill effluent being discharged into the en- vironment. Howe Sound Pulp and Paper, based in Port Mellon, has been charged with two counts of ‘‘in- troducing business waste’’ into the environment and one count of discharging waste into the en- vironment without having com- plied with the conditions of a permit. * COTTONS — 100% cotton knits, fleece and weekend wear + LINEN — walking shorts, dresses, shirts, etc. * SUITING — elegant, softly tailored blazers, skirts and trousers * FABULOUS EUROPEAN PRINTS + SILK — huge selection West Vancouver Open Fri. 10-9 p-m., Sat. 10-6 p.m. Kerrisdale 266-6211 * West Vancouver 926-2113 Robson Street 681-6612 * Kitsilano 736-9499 White Rock 538-6688 The company has also been charged with two counts of ‘‘in- troducing a deleterious substance’’ into waters that contain fish, said a statement by the environment - ministry. Fines for the offences can range up to $f million for each count under the Waste Management Act and up to $300,000 for each count under the Fisheries Act. The first court appearance is scheduled for July 28 in Sechelt Provincial Court. - Friday, July 10, 1692 -- North Shore News - 9 The great pretenders balance their budgets 44 The U.S. Defence Department saved’ tens of millions of dollars by shifting a pay day from Oct. I to Sept. 29.99 Instead, both governments call- ed it current income and ran around looking for ratholes down which to pour it. Again quoting Mr. Auchenbach about the practice: ‘*You can pic- ture the logical extension: We balance (the U.S.) budget but the Japanese own Yellowstone Na- tional Park.”’ A little-known budgetary trick is the shifting of expenses back one year or ahead one year. In the U.S. the Defence Department “‘saved’’ tens of millions of dollars by shifting a pay day from Oct. I to Sept. 29. The effect of this was to make the expenditure part of the spend- ing of a previous fiscal year. This system is known as jam * yesterday, jam tomorrow but never jam today. © Since it is still public tax dollars which are being spent, what help is it? "SHIPMENT HAS ARRIVED New carpets of the highest quality. ide selection Lowest Prices in town Guaranteed « trade-ins, repairs and handwasnhi Example: Hertz 10x7° now only $750 ORIENTAL RUGS 434 Lonsdale Ave. N. Vancouver 987-3365 No help, of course, but it looks better and confuses the taxpayers. If the expenditure is shifted to last year, well, last year’s budget is al- ready passed, spent and forgotten and nothing can be done about it. If the expenditure is shifted io next year, there are 12 months to think up a different lie. Qh dear, how familiar the fourth method is to Canadians. The Americans collect Social Se- curity from all citizens. These funds are supposedly put aside to earn interest and provide funds for pensions when those citizens retire. In fact, there as in Canada, there is no such secure fund. 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