28 - Sunday, August 11, 1985 - North Shore News Courtesy in copy shop HASTINGS > Travel Atd. DEAR MISS MANNERS — Often I find myself standing in line at the copy machine at the local print shop. When I have a large order, I choose to avail myself of the services of the shop’s employees; for just a few copies, I use the self-service copier. My time is as precious, in my estimation, as that of any other user — no more, no tess. (Some lawyers indulge in the pastime of counting up the cost of time spent waiting, as if it were to dz billed to a client, but I do not.) I always make an effort to allow enough time for waiting my turn and never ask to cut in. The result is predictable. You could probably write the rest of this ictter yourself. Typically, 1 have waited through three turns ahead of me, and invariably one has been interminable — some- . one who is copying an article from a magazine and hasn’t marked all the pages, or someone who keeps forget- ting to copy the second side of two-sided documents and goes back to check several times. In any event, when F get to the machine with my three- page letter, or 10-page brief, or whatever it is, I am all too often asked by a newcomer, “Can I just make one copy? Pl only be a minute.” it seems downright chuslish to say no, and yet I feel that I have every right to, and no obligation to someone who has not waited .on Sine. I usuaily acquiesce. In a typical circumstance several weeks ago, J had not left. sufficient time, con- fronted a long line, waited forever to get my turn, and was already 10 minutes late for an appointment wher I started copying. Of course, someone chose that momen? to ask to cut in. Instead of giving in as_ usual, I ssid no and went on to explain that I'd been waiting a long time, was late, and it just wasn’t fair. I became far too emotional and aggrevated, and embar- i rassed myself, putting the line crasher at a distinct emotional advantage, which was doubly irritating. Miss Manners, please give me one of your snappy, tactful, correct responses. GENTLE READER — How about ‘‘no”’? Oh, not quite a bald no. More like, ‘‘No, I’m so sorry, I'm already running jate.""’ You say that while running the machine, so it does not take extra time. Omit those tactless remarks aoout the unfairness of it all. The etiquette of lines does not require someone with a large load to yield to some- one with a smaller one, although it is nice to offer to do so when possible. Neither does it bar the person with the quick task from asking to go through, as long as it is understood that this is a favor and certainly need not be granted. Therefore, there is no legitimate emotional content to this. A person asking a favor cannot be classified as to a line crasher and does not deserve the brunt of your jit- teriness about running late. work yourself into an emo- tional pitch over the request. But if you should happen have an extra minute some day, why don’t you use it lo suggest to the copying shop that it have an express line, as well as the regular one? DEAR MISS MANNERS —- I was instructed by my mother thet an appreciative guest cheerfuliy assists the hostess in cleaning up after the meal. In my own home, I move my guests to the next room, leaving all cleanup for later, having done as much scrubbing as possible before the guests arrive. However, when I am in- vited to my father’s and stepmother’s home for din- ner, the kitchen and dining room must always be returned to their original immaculate state. Good china, crystal and silverware must be carefully washed, hand-dried and placed in cabinets and chests. The stove and counter-tops all must be wiped down. I feel very uncomforiable leaving my stepmother alone If you really want to save in the kitchen, but it is in- yourself time, as well as sulting to be required to do wear and tear, you should extended KP duty after a by Judith | Martin _ give up fretting. It is silly to heavy meal. It is with hesita-— acquiesce if you’re in a tion that 1 accept their in- hurry, and even sillier to vitations, and in the interest tbe C. .M..SOUND & COLOR YEARS OF PROFESSIONAL SALES & SERVICE ° me 1286 MARINE OR. 14 HOSTESS SETS * NEGLIGEE SETS LINGERIE ¢ BRAS SOUTH PARK ROYAL 922-2644. of family unity, I feel 1 should say something. GENTLE READER — How about saying io your step- mother, ‘1 haven’t finished you prefer that I go and keep him out of the kitch- what I was saying to Fath TRAVEL CE . — shall I ask himto come in is EFF fc E . 744 WEST HASTINGS ST . here and join us, or would SWISS EFFICIENCY” (AT HOWE) . 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