QUESTION:

We are going to be
married next Easter and
each of us has been advised
by friends to agree to a legal
“marriage contract”. We are
pot talking about the
marriage ceremony, but
about a contract, over and
above the marriage itself.
Would you care to comment
on what you think of
marriage contracts?

STEWART: I have no
general comment. Marriage
contracts can be extremely

valuable, or, they can be
terribly destructive. I am
happy to make a rather

starry-eyed comment about
the sort of marriage contract
that I feel can be valuable.
As jong as you are aware

that my answer is candidly
biased, it may serve to help
you think your way through.

My suggestion is that each
party sit-down alone and
write out the ways in which
he/she would like to con-
tribute to the assurance and
security and support of the
other! Write down what you
would like to assure the

Cat problems

not cheap

FROM PAGE C9

late. I'll never know why we
adopted her, unless you'll
appreciate the fact that it
was late at mght during a
blast of a party when we first
saw her. Her mother was do-
ing her best to keep track of
four stff-legged little kittens
and losing the fight. Besides.
she looked a lot like Timmy.
grev and white. What the
hell? Doesn't every famitly
need four cats?

We named her Misty.
which she hkes Soon.
because she was the smallest
(remember the Wizard of
Oz") we started to call her
Munchkin. She doesn't hke
tone bit and ignores us

She may look a fot hke
Timmy but those two decid
ed that they loathed each
other on sight) Things have
gone steadily downhill since

We worned about Keno's
reachion to a new kitten
After all, big old) tomecats
don't usually go much for
having their tails chased by
sharp toothed babies

One look at this little in
truder and he spent a whole
day outside in the rain Masty

Twin

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couldn't figure this out. She
behaved as if he was the
handsomest cat she'd ever
laid eyes on and started out
to prove it. She gave him the
dainniest of “nose touches”,
hcked about his wet ears and
purred under his chin.

Now, she curls up beside
him. steals food from his
plate and pounces on his
back just when he’s getting
down to a decent nap. I'd
hate to be another cat who
tried that

Cricket got lost when she
dived out of the car at the
vets one frosty December
day. It cost us quite a bit in
adverusing and rewards to
pet her back — but she was
so grateful to be home i
made it all worth while

Munchy has been pretty
free of troubles — touch
probably because
takes such

wood — -
the
good care of her

the other day. so
meone said to me. “Couldn't
you please take one more”

old man

Just

There's this kitten

Good thing my husband
wasnt there or wed have a
mezzo soprany for the choir!

249 50

731-2311

other, concerning the
principles of living well
together, on which you want
to base your hfe. Do the
same about your
possessions, your house,
your children, and even
about how you want to
perform in the event of a
separation or divorce. In this
first stage of thinking
through a contract, let
neither one of you write
down anything at all con-
cerning your own protection
or assurance or security. Just
write down what YOU would
like to assure the other.

The next step will be to get
together and confer aboyt
what each of you wants to
assure the other. You may
find an extraordinary
unanimity of spirit and
attitude and, even particular

. y

hat's best to give

ask hayden stewart

Freelance Counsellor Hayden Stewart may be reached at 261-6242
for appointments for individual, famil
office in the International Plaza Hotel (Open Tuesdays only) is for the
convenience of North Shore residents.

or group counselling. His

matters, like bank accounts.
You may also find that the
other fellow has thought of
things that did not occur to
you. Then, you each give
and take and compromise
and adjust and work towards
an agreement that is
rewarding to both of you.
Finally, if you wish, assign

to a lawyer the task of
wording, what you both
want, in that mysterious

legalese that they love and
are so capable of concocting
in an assuring way.

The whole procedure is
based on your love. The
other kind of marriage
contract that is based on
distrust and fear and greed
and one’s own security, I

have not thought about
much. They never work
anyway.

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_Sensibly Priced, Quality

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C15 - Sunday News, December 7, 1980

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