page 4 - January 28, 1976 - North Shore News

| QUESTION: My father “Boe

away for two or three months
on business and me and-my
young- sister are worried

about something. She’s ten.|:

—

and I’m 12. We aren’t sure if '

we are just suspicious or —

whether my mom is really
doing something that we
think isn’t good at all. What .
_ itis is that a man she likes is
coming around a lot and we
- think he may be staying real -
late or perhaps even all night :

until sometime before we | R

' wake up.

We both like this guy and.
so dees my dad, but we're: -

afraid if he knew he would!
not like it and may get a
divorce. That scares us
because we don’t want cur
mom and dad to separate.
We can’t help worry about
what would happen to us and
what would happen to them
because we are sure they
love each other. .

Do you think we. are just a

imagining it? What should
we do?

Hope suspicions unfounded...

| Big mouth shoots

STEWART: I hope you won't
mind my | ‘editing’ your
letter a little bit. I’ve made it
a little clearer, but’ I don’t
think I’ve really | changed »
what you wanted to say. I ..
feel sure you should go-to
your mom and tell her about”
how you are so: worried and .
why, and that you need her
to help you understand what:
is happening.

As you say, you may be
imagining some of your story

and she may be able to put

your minds ‘at ease. Don’t |
**accuse’’ her of anything but
tell her about your anxieties.
Let her know how much you
love her and your dad and
that that is why you are so
upset:

I’m sure your mother loves
you too and will do cher
utmost to help you. Grown-
ups have their worries: too
and perhaps you will be able
to help your mother and dad.

-Thope so.

Freelance Counsellor Haydon
Stewart doos. private counselling
as well as a great deal of group
work. ‘He can be contacted at
261-6242 {for Informaticn and
appointmenis. Lotters aro
. always wzicome. Mall them to-
HAYCEN STEWART, c/o tho
North Shore Nows, 4202-1139
* Lonsdale, North Van. .

” LONSDALE BAVE,N

from the lip

‘Question: My ‘trouble is

‘that I havea big mouth! I talk
too soon and too big and too

often about things that at the
‘time are important to me and .
~Vvery. personal, then I change ~
“my. mind* about what Pve_
sounded off about and am too’
chicken to say, “I take it ali:
. ‘back??. _ ;

vn give you sn a example: A
few months ago I decided

superstition - and. childish
‘make-believe’. As usual,..1

talked big about it and told:

everyone within reach that I
was not

then on. :

when I’ve told a bunch of
people there's nothing in it.
How ‘can .1' overcome that
crazy way of doing, things?

UE

{

t

_{:and ‘trying them, then’ the
4+ yvery.consistency turns out to ---

’ Then, if you try ‘something®

‘even better idea. So — if you

: Mama doesn’t
one night that I was living in. ~
- gp sort of dream world about
prayer. It had meant a lot to.—

_ me for years, but suddenly I
saw it all as :a lot. of:

-son and I have just been‘ A
‘given a rotten deal of the ~ a. i\@as
cards. For years now I have ||

going “to” have ©
anything to do with: it from"
ica.» Wave done everything to keep _ a
Well, the trouble is that I

still need to pray and want to |
do it. But I don’t like doing it |

. scholarship.

sew your own...

- Passports - -5 Minute Service .
6 Weddings .

“have a strong need to appear whic! e pro foo
consistent to your friends. I scouts would::attend. Here © o Foren

suppose it is good to* be. ‘was his great chance and his
‘consistent, but if one’s: . stupid coach kept him on the

. bench throughout and played ||
‘worship of consistency keeps. : ‘another. boy instead.:Fortun- .__--———
him from. liking new ideas.“ ately the boy, doesn’t seem to © ae

Q he: “very upset.

be inhibiting, doesn’t it? Pil: a fact, he has hardly. ala”
be hoping you will hang on to”: thing to me. I know he will) |
your ability to try something, ° “,.- broken-hearted when he: a
find it great: (or lacking) and ”~anderstands © “what “he ‘has: |.
‘then make your next choices. 7 * missed. I don’t. know why: 1 |:

" have written except to blast .|.

You may be right i in n feeling - vit oy sien 5 around : .

‘that you shoof off your mouth”
‘too soon and to too many: ~.

-: people. But again, that’s a STEWART: So:
, better than being so tight- scheme: fell Sorry your. 1 |.
“mouthed that nobody knows. find myself delighted forthe |.

you have had a new thought: “boy. He didn’t want to be a’.|--
or idea. Keep open to new: ‘big: football player - ~~ you
> insights, keep willing . to . wanted him to. When you
change,. but be more selec-: .. “blast the system that piays
tive.. and more ~ unhurried: * | around with a boy’ s life’, be.
about who you.share with. ™ aware that you impress at |

least one. person with- the ‘-
for a while and find you are sense at ee have. been

not ‘pleased with your choice: going exactly that — playing:
go right away to the very few - around with a boy’ 5. Me. 5
- people you'have talked ‘with _

about it and let them know ~.
you’ve given your new idea a.
good try and that all it has. -
done is ‘point you toward a.
fresh start.

I have | ‘no “doubt in the

‘world you have done it with -
love for the boy, but thank ‘.
goodness it hasn’t worked...
You have lots of time now to_.

-. get close enough to the boy
to: understand his interests .
and his wishes concerning _
7 his life.

You'll find that if you talk
to few enough people about
important personal. matters,

ye Hours: leather apparel by Lesley Norrie :

“you are quite likely to have Mon.-Sat. 10-5 accessories by Rita Outlaw - .-
their. .understanding and Perhaps the coach has Fri, ti 9. Jewellery, by Robert Gerow .:

- support : “when you “find . an: oe given you the’ ‘best :chance .
*. you’ve ever had to be a real _
insist on shooting off. your? father t to your, Boyes
mouth, do it with’, few w— =
eople-and do it with" people
jou. love: and trust.

| We. Lonsdale - 987- 4518

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QUESTION: I'm writing this’ NEW AND USED STORE

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“i

been pushing him towards’ @ |.
getting a football scholar- f.-
ship. Many times when he . §
wanted to quit all together, I

him at it.I don’t really want
to pressure the boy, but he’ @ 7 20°
is-no Intellectual giant and: §

his one chance for University - §
is- to nail down an athletic ad

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