Certainly that is the poser on
this Canadian’s mind as our coun-
try heads into its own uncertain
political future. .

Let’s face it: consciously or not,

*“ we tend to mimic our American

cousins. When the winds of
chance waft below the 49th
parallel, we are the ones with our
nostrils in the air. ’

I have this theory that people
with cats as pets are -- no matter
how much they may claim other-

’ wise’—~ only vaguely in control of

their lives.»

‘Frankly, it scares hell out of me
: to think. we could end up with a
leader in this country with as little
command over his or her own
_ destiny as I presently enjoy.

Dogs, now, dogs are different.
[ve had dogs before, too, and |
know that the sole purpose of a
dog’s life is to please.

Reward a dog with a ‘‘Good

* Boy!,"? followed by the occasional

pat_on the head, and he will be
: your pal forever.
Nine times out of 10, a dog so

“treated will roll over in sycophan-

tic delight, or, if a puppy, attempt
‘to lick your face off.

Not so with cats. Pve seen ii cat
“nub up against his master’s legs,
‘and, when. given a playful tickle
“behind thé ears in acknowl!
edgement, rake his claws from the
owner's kneebone to shin while
simultancously purring.

Two cats inhabit our home-.
stead, one of which, Snagglepuss,
has a’ passion for power,

: His lust for position is piloted
by a zest‘for food, as is amply il-
lustrated by his size (roughly the
equivalent of a small Honda). .

I'd seriously consider stapping a’
‘GVW sticker on his vast haunch,if
‘didn't think he'd lacerate my /

rst cat.

NOW THAT President Bill Clinton is officially installed in
the White House — bringing with him a transition team of
change that includes, among lesser luminaries, Socks, the

. family pet — the pressing question all Canadians are ask-
ing themselves is: Will Canada follow suit and elect a cat
owner as prime minister? eins

HUGHES’ VIEWS .

think it’s pure fancy when | tell
you that Snagglepuss is equipped
with such analytical thought pro-
cesses, but J swear this cat knows
that his food costs money.

He may not be too sure what
nioncy is exactly, but he is aware
that you have to work to get it,
and if he suspects 1 may be sluck-
ing off in that area, his diligent
hectoring knows no bounds of -
common decency, :

As! write this column, for in-
stance, during which { will spend
up to four days performing ex-
ploratory nasal surgery while

vaiting for pithy pieces of prose
to leap into my brain, Snagglepuss
will lever his huge carcass onto the
filing cabinet, glaring down acme
as if to say, Bg ‘or God's sake, get
on with it! Time is money, and ,
“money is ‘Tender Vittles. Write ,

/something!"*
Correct me if na wrong, but |

» always assumed pets were suppos-

ed to enrich one’s fife.
“Give your cata good home, a

forearms before | got thechance, *, quiet place to sleep, nourishing

Oh, i know you u'll probably

food, and he will reward you with

years of affection,’ said my vet,

in that calm reassuring manner all
vets seen to have when reasonably
sure your cheque will clear the
bank.

As | recall, he said this approx-
imately five minutes before Snag-
glepuss sank a mouthful of fangs
into the kindly soul’s thumb.

I don't like to brag, but if it -

"wasn’t for my neatly applied

tourniquet, that vet wouldn’t to-
day be enjoying his beachfront ;
property on Tahiti.

The truth is, cats aren’t really.
bundles of affection. | sometimes
think that my sole reason for tiv-
ing is to provide Snagglepuss with
a constant source of grub.

“You own a can opener,
therefore you are,"’ seems to sum
up the feline philosophy fairly
succinetly.

Cats have this remarkable i in-
dependent streak. They seem to
look at humans with a sort of
grudging tolerance, as if we were
a necessary, but rather distasteful,
factof life,

We are regarded, 1 believe, as-a
species of cat valets.

‘Perhaps this disdainful outlook
is what gives cats their particular
charm.

They seem to be constantly
reminding us that, although they
may share our lives, they will
never. give up the dignity of being
animals.

Having said this, | should
report that there are moments
when (he barriers come down,

{can recall one occasion, after
# particularly frustrating day,
when Snagglepuss curled up on
my lap, and, after purring for.

several minutes, fell asleep.

He remained in that position
for at feast (5 minutes with no
spillage of my blood to mar the
event, | walked around for days
afterward bathed in’a sort of
warn, simpering delight.

[teil you, now that a cat is

“seratching the furniture in the

Oval office, we are in real danger

of losing « control >| altogether.

IN Nothing to hide, nothing to fear.

Dear Editor:

I would like to take this oppor-
* tunity to thank the North Shore
* News for the excellent coverage it
has given to the monster house
‘:probiem. ;

-This is‘a prime example to the
“benefit of having a community

" Rewspaper. A ‘great: number. of

. peopie worked very hard to make
"people aware of what was happen-
ing. in = our , community,, Your
coverage helped ensure a good
turnout at council mectings.

Even now, Mr. Plunkett, Direc-

“tor of Planning and Development

« Services,’ describes the. new pro- °

. posals . as :‘texcessively restrictive

and almost -unworkable.’? I would |

ask, restrictive to whom?
: Over | the: past 30 years, many «

"families have lived happily in ,

Park Royal ‘deliberately destroyed’ Jand °

Dear Editor:

In all good conscience, how can

. Park. Royal ‘deliberately, destroy

five acres of leased Indian Land
that: :was. used’ as a community

am _fecreational area?

It. appears Park Royal cares
nothing for the community ‘that
’ financially supports it.

‘Yes,-it is true Park -Royal was .

". two-floor homes without feeling
the need to expand dramatically.

‘. My home was originally. 2,300
sq, ft. We expanded by building
(with permits) another bedroom in

the carport. This added 320.sq ft.

without affecting any neighbor.

This bedroom was built
Specifically to enjoy the -view,
That view was 100%.destroyed by
the monster house. -

However, now if the new bylaw
is adopted, what 1 have left is
- protected.

1 am sad’ because the bylaw
cannot be retroactive; | am happy

. because no one else will have to

endure what { endured. :

1 appreciate the efforts and co-
Operation from. Coun.s Crist,
Gadsby and Cuthbert. I do not
appreciate the remarks by Coun,
Turner,

not legally required to hold any
public meeting or to inform the

He has forgotten who elected
him, *

All of this could’ have been
avoided by drafting a bylaw that
said ‘ta replacement building (res-
idential) in.an established - neigh-
borhood can be no higher than
the original roofline.” ‘

1 have requested NVD staff to
provide me with all the applicable
documentation to prove that
“my” monster house is legal.
They have tefused to provide me
with copies of the documentation.
‘T have been granted access but not
copies:

H they have nothing to hide,
they have nothing to fear,

Again: my sincere thanks to all
concerned.

Harry Mayor
. North Vancouver

This at a time when most of’
these indigenous animals are

community beforehand, but they . sheltered from the harsh winter

are morally responsible, as ‘cor-
porate citizens to at the very least
let the people of West and North.’

elements. |
Where will

Park Royal doesn’t. care... Ap-

Vancouver know of all future de- *, ‘parently: they only care for their

velopment plans.
All too quickly our. forest that
‘had been a habitat for wildlife ©
was torn down. -

\ profit margin.”

Pat McGillion

West Vancouver,

the animals go?,

Friday, January 22, 1993 - North Shore News - 7

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